Reaching out.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Eddie1000, Nov 11, 2013.

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  1. Eddie1000

    Eddie1000 New Member

    Hi, I've just joined today.
    Never done this before, achalay never been on a forum before.
    Anyway, I am a 46 year old man, 2 young children, my wife wants a divorce and I have lost my job.
    Everything I have worked for over the last 30 years I have lost. I am living in a rented room, see my children once a week (who I love and miss so much). I am trying to find another job, but this is proving harder than I first thought. I haven't told my ex wife yet that I have lost my job. I feel like such a loser. I can't see any future at all at the moment. My ex wife has the house, the kids, a job she enjoys and seems to have enough money to buy herself a new car, outfits all the time and go out while I struggle to pay the bills. I don't hate my wife, but she don't seem to understand what it's like for me. Whenever she was down (and that was a lot) I would be there for her. Asking for some sort of support from her was hard. I would be called a 'baby' or 'it's like having a teenager around the house', etc.
    Sometime, well most of the time I feel like there is no way out.
    I love my children so much, I can't bear the thought of leaving them behind, but in a way I feel it might be for the best. The house will be payed for, and I am well insured, so there will be security there and hopefully my ex will find someone who is decent. I know this sounds like shit, but even if I get a job soon, I still don't know I am going to pay for everything.
    I know what you are going to say, so that's fine. I think I just wanted to get it out.
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Your wife is well off she does not need your insurance money you children need YOU you know that if you leave they will also be thrown into depression I am sorry life is kicking you hard right now and i am glad you are posting here There are others here in the same boat that have pulled through and so can you ok Just right now it seems so overwhelming
    Perhaps you and your wife can go together and get marriage counseling if she won't go you go ok it will help you. You are not a loser hun it is hard to get work i know that i am searching too. but in time something will come up. Keep talking to us ok it helps to know you are not alone
     
  3. Eddie1000

    Eddie1000 New Member

    Thank you for coming back to me Total Eclipse.
    I know what you say makes sense. I find it hard to shake this off. It has been going on for such a long time.
    I wish and hope things will change soon.
     
  4. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I too hope things will change for you soon ok but until they do know you have this place to reach out too the feelings of wanting to leave are just that ok you do not have to act on those feelings better you continue to reach out to supports around you your doctor a crisis line and here ok I know somewhat how you feel and i too have reached out ok to crisis to my doc so you do it too ok Use whatever supports you can to keep you here hun for your children hugs
     
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