So, yes, this is another suicide post. typical. But, I don't know what to say to anyone or what to do anymore. I swear, no-one seems to care about me or my situation, and the only person who would care if I was gone tomorrow is my mother and my uncle. That's it. And I'm done caring about them. I know suicide is selfish. It's a selfish act, but I just don't care anymore. You see, I'm alot like other people here on this forum. I've been depressed from an early age, since I was about 16 is when I was really depressed. I am 21 now. About 2 years ago is when I decided and have thoughts about killing myself. I have confided to a person who was a close friend at the time who was one of those college youth ministers for a christian group called Cru, and I have tried to get for my depression since then. I have been to groups, talk to people, physciatrist and therapists, and even got myself admitted to a psych ward in my city, and that didn't help, the psych ward. I know some places are good for people, but that place was awful. There were tales and rumors about alot of malpractices going on there. Anyways, I have tried exhaustingly to get help for myself. Tried. I am done trying. I'm done. You see, my depression steams from one big major problem that has been a source for all my negative feelings, and this my incomptenece. Everytime I seem to make a new friend, or meet some a new girl, they seem to shun me or not talk to me anymore because I believe I fucked up in the relationship. I fucked up. I have really fucked up a couple of relationships that I've had with people. And that's not due to my "illness" or anything, that's due to me. And, I never get to see or know why I'm turning people against me. I think I bother people constantly without knowing it. I have no friends, and no relations or grilfriends. I have friends at college, but I never get to do anything with them outside of class even though I invite them. I must be so desperate. All I really want, is a friend. That's it. I think I'm just too angry and bitter to be friends with anyone though. I'm just tired. I'm so tired. My name is Jarred, I'm 21. And even though I know that's a young age, and people have lived way longer than me that are depressed, I am ready to die.