Not trying to get dramatic about it. Have no job, friends, family, place to live and just in general life sucks. I am not about to hang myself or do any of that other crap that only works like half the time. <I just want edit moderator total eclipse method> I know I'm gonna get the "don't do it!" and I don't begrudge anyone for doing that but c'mon now, this has gone on too long and I'm sick of it. I'm ready to go, its fine, I'm ok with it. I'm not even mad really but I don't have the fight in me anymore to dig out of this massive hole.