Ready to rest with sister

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#1
Hi, my name is kelly I am 20 and I have many mental health problems, I lost my sister to suicide two years ago and am literally on the verge of going with her. i was admitted to hospital on wednesday after being found after another attempt and was diagnosed chronically suicidal.
I am currently homeless, all my friends have walked away from me because apparently having mental health issues makes me a 'attention seeker'.
my mum couldnt care less about me but more about when she can get her next fix or next drink.
the only person that says they care is my psychologist and she doesnt really cause i guess thats just her job to make her patients feel cared for. she says she doesnt want me to be her first suicide.
people keep telling me not to join my sister that i dont know what after life will really be like, but then they tell me how my sister is at peace and in a happier place now, how can it be one way for my sister and another way for me, i mean it seems so contridictory and 2 faced to say my sister is happy and at peace but that if i do it i am going into the unknown and that its not the answer. its all i think about from when i wake up to when i go to sleep ( well what little sleep i get)
i just want to be left to be with my sister, wish people would stop butting in and finding me and stop trying to save me when i do not want saving.
kim (my sister) deserved to be here so so so so much more than me, kim im coming home. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
 

Speedy

Staff Alumni
#2
Welcome to the forums, Kelly. I know it may sound routine or generic to say, but I truly am sorry to hear about your loss of your sister and the difficulties you are going through.
 

Sadeyes

Staff Alumni
#3
Hi Kelly Faith, and welcome...that is just awful how you are being treated...is there anyone who can advocate for you? I know first hand how horrific the medical systems can be, and I have learned to expect it...your so called friends should also be ashamed of themselves! Welcome again, and know we are here, and that I hope you get the support and caring you deserve here
 
#4
I have asked for a advocate but anyone is yet to get back to me and that was over a month ago , i have given up, found a window of oppurtuiny to take my life and not be found or stopped so my stay here was short lived, i have today to talk with people here but it wont change my mind anymore, no one will help me so i cant see any other way anymore at all. I just need to be with my sister now. its all i need! :'(
 
#6
My teams wont help me hun, I have begged and begged for more help, been in hospital so so much lately, no one is helping or even trying to for that matter, i have no other way out of everything, :'(
 
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