I am trying really hard to work on dealing with my anxiety when it comes to dealing with going out in public. Today, in particular, the last thirty minutes has really tested me and not in a good way. The downtown area that I live in is bombarded with a shitload of Fifa team usa "fans" who for whatever dumbass reason got together in various bars to watch the U.S. get eliminated. It's not that I don't like soccer...I fucking hate the world cup and the bullshit media overhyping it is one of the reasons why. If that wasn't annoying enough, walking downtown is a constant chore because damn near 90 percent of the goddamn population here are in a relationship. How do I know this? Because I can't blink without seeing some jerkface guy and woman fucking holding hands or holding each other on the fuckin sidewalk. Worse, they walk so goddamn slow and take up nearly the entire sidewalk. I don't know how many times I wanted to just scream for some jackass couple to fucking move. And it's not just couples.....these people or rather broods of family that come downtown walking like molasses, half watching there kids, the other half watching their dumbass cell phones and no one is really watching the pedestrian light up ahead that tells them to basically pay the fuck attention. I know that's just some crazy rambling, but I'm pissed and I'm pissed at more than just those things. Right now, my life feels like it's not moving. I mean, I'm working and I am trying to have a social life, but I don't see it getting better. I haven't drank in nearly four months, but I really feel frustrated right now. Sorry for writing all of this, it's just I'm tired of life feeling so damn uncertain.