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REALLY want to die ...

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Mama_Pills, Jun 3, 2010.

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  1. Mama_Pills

    Mama_Pills Well-Known Member

    I hate being so alone, and knowing I did it to myself.
  2. Perfect Melancholy

    Perfect Melancholy SF Friend

    :hiya: hey there, what's wrong. Talk to us?
  3. Mama_Pills

    Mama_Pills Well-Known Member

    I'm so sick of my friends not even caring that I exist anymore because of my depression and just being happy while I'm like this. It's not fair that everyone gets to be happy and I don't. It's not fair that even when I still try to talk to them and be pleasant with them and care about them, they go out and do things without telling me, or they just ignore me, because "no one wants to hang out with the depressed girl".
  4. Perfect Melancholy

    Perfect Melancholy SF Friend

    True friends, those rare people that make your world. They are the ones worth sticking around for, I know how much the rejection can hurt believe me. How alone and isolated depression makes you, it is all a risk factor.

    How much do you tell them, and how much can you trust those close to you. Unfortunately for people like us, the one's that struggle to find a place to find real true friendships it is a struggle.

    Believe me there are people out there who care for you, sometimes they may not show it. Sometimes they get caught up in there own worlds there own battles and hell they will let you down. But trust me keep reaching out to people, there are people here who care who will always listen and support you.

    I know how much it hurts and I am sorry you are going through this you are not alone okay. So please do not ever feel that way.
  5. Mama_Pills

    Mama_Pills Well-Known Member

    I had to hide at work today to cry after 2 weeks of not crying, which is the longest time I've gone without in a really long time. I can't remember the last time I went more than maybe 5 days. I just can't stop thinking about it, because I'm trying so hard to be good enough for them to want to be my friend again, but it's not working and I don't know why. I'm afraid I hurt them beyond repair. I hate myself for this.
  6. Perfect Melancholy

    Perfect Melancholy SF Friend

    Have you tried talking to them or even sending an email sometimes that is easier. Explain how you feel, and that you don't want to lose them?
  7. Mama_Pills

    Mama_Pills Well-Known Member

    I've tried explaining it, and they just say, "I know." I don't know how to take that.
  8. xXxRNBxXx

    xXxRNBxXx Senior member

    i can relate to this so much :( x
  9. Perfect Melancholy

    Perfect Melancholy SF Friend

    Maybe you need to give them a bit of time, if they are your true friends they will come around. But believe me when I say please do not worry, or hurt over this. At the end of the day, your true friends will stick by you, and as for the ones that don't well they ain't worth knowing are they.

    As Marilyn Monroe said "I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best."
  10. Mama_Pills

    Mama_Pills Well-Known Member

    I'm really trying not to worry, but it gets hard sometimes, especially when I know they go out without me.
  11. Mikeintx

    Mikeintx Well-Known Member

  12. Mama_Pills

    Mama_Pills Well-Known Member

  13. lachrymose27

    lachrymose27 Well-Known Member

    You should find friends who are more supportive
  14. The4saken1

    The4saken1 Member

    Some of us do not even have friends...:(
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