Really Want To....

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Godsdrummer, Aug 12, 2009.

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  1. Godsdrummer

    Godsdrummer Guest

    Go home, grab my alarm clock, my pillows, and my daughters key to my apartment, then skip Church band practice tonight. Go back to my apartment, with a case of beer and a 5th of whiskey and 2 packs of smokes and get totally shitfaced drunk, and then take care of business.

    Of course I am practical, so I would set the alarm clock first, so that if I were still alive in the morning I could go to work.


    But I really want to do this.
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    So angry frustrated coming off smokes gets one very agitated I hope you can get pass whatis making you feel this way. You have come so far obtained so much for your efforts don't throw it away. Can you call your therapist and book another session talk what going on clear your mind a bit.
    Hang in there okay go for a run work out gym release the anger but it a good way. sorry your feeling rotten wishing you some peace soon.
     
  3. Godsdrummer

    Godsdrummer Guest

    I want to do this, but I prolly wont. I will go to band practice, and then have a family meeting, and then go down in the basement and beat the hell out of my drums. lol

    God I miss my g/f, too.
     
  4. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    Hey hun first sorry about my remark about doing the drinkin buddy thing. Really didnt know you were AA. So no more of that. And no more for you either. Bill you know too well that yep it might ease the pain a little but it fogs the thinking process even more. And as much as smoking is bad for ya, if you really need to slip or fall back on something, let it be a smoke. I think you are so strong to be quitting all these things at once. But you know that the cravings are going to be bad. And with the urges always being there to end it all, wow what a combination to battle!!! You have quite the fight ahead of you. But I really am amazed at your personal strength and the way you can bounce back (gonna start calling ya tigger.. their heads are made out of rubber their tails are made out of spring lol). Tonight instead of thinking about all the negatives things you want to do, why not try something you havent in a long time that you enjoy. Go somewhere public where you cant smoke, like maybe bowling. An outlet to get some of the pent up stuff out and work throught the cravings and desires. Hell you may even have a good time (lol). And if nothing else you have us here Bill. Too many of us care a great deal about you so you know you arent going to find any easy outs with us. If we are similiar in time zones I'm always up way past my bedtime (only time I get to use the puter lol). Happy to chat away the thoughts and urges with ya!
     
  5. Godsdrummer

    Godsdrummer Guest

    I dont have internet at home yet.

    But I made up my mind, I am going to go to the church band practice. And then depending on how I am feeling when I get home I will retire to the basement and pund the tar out of my drums, and depending on how the wife is feeling, well...we will see.

    It is nice to know that I am cared for by all you knuckleheads. lol
     
  6. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Well, how are your drums this morning? It really can be catharctic to let yourself get lost in your music. I hope it helped you. You are doing a great job with your addictions. Keep at it. :hug:
     
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