Reasons why i want to kill myself.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by lonelyloser098, Mar 3, 2011.

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  1. - I don't have any friends. So nobody will really care if I'm bone for good.
    - I don't have any goals. I don't have any ambitions to be something ever since. I don't know who I am and what I wan't I wan't to be.
    - I don't have any money. I don't have a job. So that would mean that I'm still gonna die without going to suicide, but i don't like to wait.
    - There's nothing for me here. I'm pretty much useless. Nobody will help me so what's the point?

    These are the reasons why i need a suicide plan badly. And it is pretty much good enough to kill myself.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    there is help for you you can change call hospital get signed in for a couple days get on meds get therapy get on disability benefits if your doctor says you can't work You have to do the reaching out though it is there in the community at the hospital through your regular doctor who will help you find the supports you need as well hugs
  3. peacelovingguy

    peacelovingguy Well-Known Member

    You sound like your going through some bad depression. I'm guessing you know this - as most people seem to know these days due to the more open attitude we have towards it. Most people are open, a few idiots closed minded also, and I hope your not a victim of this. I hate bullies.

    Depression ticks off all the boxes in your post. I'm not trivialising this but just trying to persuade you that your own judgement of your own self is so harsh than even hanging judges would hold back a little!

    Also, depression makes you less likely to deal with little problems. Each has their own 'little problems' to deal with depending on age, your sex, economic situation and so on. But all said and done, it's the same thing in that you, we, would allow these small problems to build up to a point whereby it just becomes one big problem. We then feel more despondent about ourselves - less able to cope.

    You think nobody has felt what you feel - and in some ways it is true because you as an individual have a unique take on life. But we are not alone in this world - it only seems that way because depression, with a touch of social isolation and a smattering of low self esteem does that to you. It really can screw with your mind.

    But even if you are suffering depression, no matter how down you might put yourself, part of us knows that we do have right to try to be happy. Also, we have to understand that happiness is going to involve other people. Making that connection gets easier as you grow older. Sometimes a lot of younger people struggle to make friends, especially in this day and age - but don't worry about that because once you move away from that playground life starts to happen. You get to choose who you want to be with or not as the case might be!

    I have a suicide plan myself. Several in fact involving various scenarios. I know that no matter how bad I might be feeling about myself, I'd be willing to help save someone who was trying to commit suicide.

    On those lines, lets say I passed the docks one night, heard a splash and maybe a cry, I'd have to do something. Some say that for a child they would take a bigger risk - but everyone is someone's child.

    Out of curiosity, lets say you were passing by the canal and saw me trying to rescue the struggling person in the water. Would you, at that point, be wishing it was you drowning or would you suddenly find your spirits rose enough for you to do the right thing?

    I know what your thinking, that you'll never have the chance to save a life. True, its unlikely the average person will be in that definitive situation of having to do something drastic - but sometimes, for all we know, just smiling at someone and wishing them a good afternoon might make THAT difference. Sometimes we are around people so long that we don't realise the connections we make.

    Even if you were an orphan, someone will have cared and does care.

    As for not knowing who you are - some men and women get to their deathbed of old age and just realise that! Maybe you need to know who you are - but you do not do that by looking in a mirror. My guess is that you know most of who you are but need those few jigsaw pieces to fit into the picture. The depression will hinder this so we need to deal with it and you'll come out of this not only knowing who you are and what you want. hopefully you'll be more at ease with other people and find people who will be friends. Maybe snag yourself a lover also. After all, most men and women are more sure of themselves when they have fun with someone they love.

    You should talk to someone about your suicidal thoughts though - at least tell your family your feeling depressed and obviously a doctor also.

    I hope you can find the strength inside to beat this. There us help out there and many people in your position who can talk to you and help you through this horrible time.

    Everyone I know and have ever met has come talent, some skill, something to offer others. I see this in EVERY child I know, but alas, somewhere along the way things get lost, dreams get set to one side as the 'practical' things become more important.

    As for work, hold on in there, there are millions of us all over the world and if we don't get work then we'll create work as teams rebuild whatever has been destroyed by the angry peoples.

    Education is a must though - not just for earning a wage but for keeping sane in a world which might seem more insane.

    Oh, I've added to you my friend list also. Now you have an a****** for a friend! Damn!
  4. Fitzy

    Fitzy Well-Known Member

    People will help you if you ask them to. Have you seen a doctor or a counsellor? x
  5. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    if you can overcome your depression, your other problems will probably work out, or at least, they won't depress you so much.

    When you are depressed, it's hard to a get a job, because it's stressful and it takes energy to work.

    It's hard to maintain friendships, because you don't feel like being around people, and often people are not supportive when you are in a bad mood

    It's hard to have goals, because depression just makes everything seem awful.

    and these problems then make you even more depressed.
  6. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    On a scale of 1-10, 10 being that you will definitley kill yourself, where do you place your self on there?

    Once you have answered you will see why I have asked that?

  7. kylee

    kylee Member

    I"m in the same boat as you. Its rough. I feel completely alone and friendless, but I know that I will have plenty of opportunity to change this. You can fix these problems. Petty things will make me smile and remind me that lifes not so bad. Just try not to let yourself be overwhelmed by these feelings, and know that it can only get better.
  8. There's really nothing for me to hold on to. I keep thinking about reasons for me to survive but there's really nothing. I should have done this long time ago.
  9. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    I think that your problems can work out. We can try to help, also a crisis line

    I hope that you are able to find a way to overcome this!
  10. The only problem that I have is how to do it.
  11. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    let's say there was a way that your depression could be taken away, and that you could live happily. would you be willing to try something like that, or do you feel like you wouldn't even want to try?
  12. I'm not depressed.
  13. This sounds like a severe depression talking. I think you need to see a mental health specialist. Is there any reason you feel like you're not depressed?

    Depression can manifest itself many different ways. Just because you don't feel "sad" all the time doesn't necessarily mean you're not depressed. Some of my most suicidal days happen on my "good" days.

    What you need is a counselor, or a sponsor, or just someone you can talk to. It's a good thing you're here because everyone here is willing to listen.
  14. od3n

    od3n New Member

    I have the same problem that you have i dont know how to do it! i have hade suicide thoughts for over 10 years and now i am sick of it. nothing ever goes better i am doomd to live in darkness. i think allot to xxxx a freind to me did it and it went as planned,

    sry for bad english
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