Recently started to self-harm. :\

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by happyville, Dec 27, 2010.

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  1. happyville

    happyville Well-Known Member

    I wasn't a self-harmer until post-rehab, after I moved in with my brother and his wife. When he'd get angry with me, his wife would be vindictive - she enjoyed it when he was angry with me, so I had no one to talk to in this house. I'd picked up a razor from work months ago - I wasn't sure why I did, I just wanted it, and I kept it in my purse for ages. After the third time of him yelling at me (over something stupid), of him accusing me of things that I wasn't guilty of, after his wife smirked at me over it, etc. It was late, I had no one to talk to, and I got the razor out. I haven't been able to stop since - I wear wrist-warmers or large bracelets, long-sleeved jackets that fall past my hands if the bracelets are too painful to wear (especially at work, where wrist-warmers aren't allowed but bracelets are).

    It makes me feel better about everything - about my accidental addiction to painkillers, about a friendship falling to tatters because a friend decided to start using meth (like half my family has), about my living situation - and I don't know how to stop when it's the only thing that makes me feel better.
     
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Hi Kimberly...the way to stop is to work on what is causing you pain...it sounds like the place you are living, and I presume you have to live there, requires you to find another way to deal with those ppl...they are damaged and you cannot take to heart all that they say...anyone who would hurt you and anyone one who would find joy in watching someone hurt you should not be considered anyone who counts...yes, this living arrangement sounds very difficult...is there anywhere else to live? Can you make long term plans to move out so that you feel you are working towards something better? Can you get counselling to strengthening you? Please continue to let us know how you are doing...J
     
  3. ~Young-Violet~

    ~Young-Violet~ Banned Member

    Hello Kimberly :)

    I'm glad you are searching for help and support with your self harming, that is a big step to take, so weldone. It doesn't seem like home is the best place to be right now and seems very difficult. Is it possible to stay with relatives or friends until the house calms down? Would that be possible?

    It seems like you have alot of pain in your life which is making you hurt iinside, do feel you have anybody to talk to? Self harming is a very common thing and many teens/adults do it, so you know your not alone :hug: The best way to stop is confideing in someone letting your emotions out, let them spread, do you owe a diary? If so you can write/doodle in that so you are not keeping everything locked up, how does that sound?

    Peeople who hurt you or like seeing you hurt is very selfish you could also report abuse to yourr local police station who will be able to help you, hang in there, keep us posted on how you are doing :)
     
  4. happyville

    happyville Well-Known Member

    Thank you guys so much for the responses, the tips were great. I have a job but I work for my brother - this is a small town and all of the jobs are taken, basically, unless I want to work at 5 am gathering up people's trash - and my mom is working on getting me a part-time job on top of the job I have now where she works. I'm still looking for other, better jobs, but so far, no such luck. Hopefully I can start freelance writing again, but that never pays much aside from pocket money.

    I do plan to move out, but I have to pay off my $150-a-week car first, and find a roommate. Either that, or wait it out until I go to college next year.
     
  5. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Happy...glad you have plans that way the way they treat you is temporary...just think of that when they are being mean and it may help get you through...please let us know how you are doing...J
     
  6. ~Young-Violet~

    ~Young-Violet~ Banned Member

    Here are a few ways you can distract yourself, thinking of you :hugtackles:

    Often the best thing is to find out what has worked for other people who understand where you're coming from. TheSite.org asked young people from young people's mental health service, 42nd Street in Manchester, to come up with some of the alternatives that help them.
    Alternative therapies: massage, reiki, meditation, acupuncture, aromatherapy.
    Bake or cook something tasty.
    Clean (and won't your folks/housemates be pleased!).
    Craftwork: make things, draw or paint.
    Dance your socks off.
    Eat sweets or chocolate for an instant sugar rush (but be careful of the dip in your mood once it's over).
    Exercise for a release of endorphins and that feel-good factor.
    Forward planning - concentrate on something in the future, like a holiday.
    Go for a walk (preferably further than the local pub).
    Go online and look at websites that offer you advice and information.
    Hang out with friends and family.
    Have a bubble bath with lots of bath bombs fizzing around you.
    Have a good cry.
    Hug a soft toy.
    Invite a friend round.
    Join a gym or a club.
    Knit (it's not just for old people you know).
    Listen to music.
    Moisturise.
    Music: singing, playing instruments, listening to (basically making as much noise as you can).
    Open up to a friend or family member about how you are feeling.
    Pop bubble wrap.
    Phone a helpline or a friend.
    Play computer games.
    Play with a stress ball or make one yourself.
    Read a book.
    Rip up a phone directory (does anyone actually use them these days?).
    Scream into an empty room.
    Shop 'til you drop.
    Smoke - smokers find that having a fag can help.
    Spend time with babies (when they're in a good mood).
    Tell or listen to jokes.
    Use the internet.
    Visit a zoo or a farm (animals do the best things).
    Volunteer for an organisation (will make you feel all warm inside).
    Watch TV or films - particularly comedies.
    Write: diary, poems, a book.
    Write negative feelings on paper, then rip them up.
    Yoga: meditation, deep breathing - this might help you relax and control your urges.
    Zzz - get a good night's sleep.
     
  7. happyville

    happyville Well-Known Member

    Thanks, Violet - those are amazing tips. :)
     
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