Regret is like poison...

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Brandon Kwon, Mar 27, 2016.

  1. Brandon Kwon

    Brandon Kwon Banned Member

    I feel so much regret...The love of my life...I've told many people the story that my fiancee lied to me and dumped me...But...That's not the full truth. She did lie and she did dump me...But I did kind of flip my shit on her. I demanded explanations, I demanded reasons, she didn't give me any until I broke her down enough to make her say something...By the time I realized I was in the wrong and tried to make amends, it was too late...She was done with me. I...I just feel so awful...I loved her...I still love her. I wanna go back in time and scream at my past self for what I did. To stop it. Why? Why was I such an idiot? Why was I such a piece of shit? This regret has flowed through me like poison...Slowly killing me from the inside. I felt the need to confess...Why?

    One of the last words she said to me while we were still a couple was "Why did you have to ruin a perfectly good thing?"

    Why did I ruin a perfectly good thing?

    And now I am alone...Cold...Miserable...A fitting punishment for a man like me...
  2. Unknown_111

    Unknown_111 Forum Buddy Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Brandon, I know you are hurting from this relationship but you have to be strong. The relationship has already hurt and no doubt have a major impact on future and any future relationship. Your hurting yourself by self-hating but why let this turmoil eat you up.

    The after effects are long-term damaging but I assure it will take you a long time to recover asylum both were very close. Perhaps it's too late and hurt felt by your friend means you have burnt your bridges.

    Have you tried to apologise to her? I know she might not want to do anything with you. Perhaps if you write a simple note saying "sorry" and telling her you did care but realise it's too late. Leave channels open as you never know.

    You are at all time low now, but it will take time to move on. When you are low, you have to find the strength to move on. It's hard but trust me, it does get easy with tine.

    Please stay strong and keep posting.