Regrets... terrible but innevitable

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by nowalone, Jun 5, 2010.

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  1. nowalone

    nowalone Member

    I think we all wish to live a life without regret, but sometimes it's hard to not wish we did things differently. When your life seems to be going your way then it's easy to say that you don't regret a thing. Why?... Because we say if I didn't do what I did I would'nt be here in this position. It can work positive or negative. Well when your life is suddenly changed by losing someone you love to suicide, regret is constantly in the back of your mind. I can personally say that I have played back every single day backwards before my fiance took her life. I wish I was home, I wish I never told you any lies, I wish I could've said the right words, I wish I hugged you more, I wish I never put you down in anyway, I wish I never made you cry, I wish I came with you whenever you went somewhere alone, I wish I had more money to give you better things, I wish I was a better man, I wish I never left for work that morning, I wish I would've called you more, I wish I never hurt you in anyway, I wish I would've put your feelings before mine at all times, I wish I was more responsible, I wish I would've let you do everything you wanted to do, I wish I had another day, I wish you were here, I wish we were together, I wish I could talk to you one more time, I wish I could kiss you and hold you forever, I wish we were still gonna get married in a month, I wish you just called me that day, I wish you would've told me everything that was on your mind, I wish you had someone other than me helping you too, I wish God didn't give you more than you could handle, I wish we were at the beach right now with our dog, I wish you noticed how many people actually loved you, I wish you would've just quit that stupid job, I wish the Lord would've given you a break, I wish I could've read your mind, I wish we never put anything off, I wish I could go back to the night before, I wish I would've cuddled you everynight, I wish I could've been a better fiance, I wish I could've promissed you the brightest future, I wish..... You were here right now.
     
  2. Ziggy

    Ziggy Antiquitie's Friend

    Hi. It's hard to know what to say, I've lost friends and have many regrets, but a fiance? I can't begin to know what that feels like.

    It's easy to hate myself. To feel useless, unable to help those I care about. And yet these people wanted the best for me, they wanted me to live, and enjoy life. The results? Well I could ramble on about my life, and continue with a confused mess of contradictions. The only thing I know for sure, is that these people didn't want me to live with regrets, they wanted me to be happy. Easier said then done, but I have to try.
     
  3. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    Well when your life is suddenly changed by losing someone you love to suicide, regret is constantly in the back of your mind.
    I know that feeling oh so well....
    I understand how and what you are feeling but somehow we go on.....
    we have to reach out for help and support and go on for the loved ones who are left...
    are you getiing some grief counceling or other help....
    I hope you'll keep posting here so we can support you..
     
  4. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    I have never lost anyone to sucide because I do not have anyone right now. The one I had left for a word.

    I can understand regrets though. Funny I used to have none till I lost her.
     
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