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Staff Alumni
right so this post is dedicated to relaxing after a hard day or stressful day or upsetting day i learn t these things in hospital and they really do help if you can think of more , please do add below :)

* firstly find some calming music or nature sounds that bring a quite frame of mind.
* lay down somewhere comfortable
* maybe some things to do before you start this is to have a oil burner going or incense burning as the scent often helps relax you too .
* starting at your toes and working your way slowly up your body using every muscle you can think of
start by clenching your toes really hard and wait a few seconds almost till it hurts. then very slowly release the muscles and stretch, same with your calf's etc etc and work your way up your body .
* while doing this focus on your breathing something to look up is mindful breathing . which focuses on knowing whats going on around you but bringing it back to focusing on just breathing in and out slowly.

feel free to add more tips below if you can think of some :)

total eclipse

SF Friend
Staff Alumni
Have the light turn to low turn off anything that will distract you like your cell phone etc quiet and calm. Try going to a place in your mind that is your place of joy like a sandy beach or a meadow just relox no distractions.


Staff Alumni
i found this resource talking about what i described above but its a walk thru of step by step how to do this so thought id post it here for those of u who would like more help in trying this , please feel free to add to this post with things u find helpful to relax

Learning to Relax
Relaxation is useful for reducing physical and mental tension. Relaxation help people to: reduce worry and anxiety, improve sleep and relieve physical symptoms caused by stress (e.g. Headaches, stomach pains, diarrhoea or constipation).
If you follow the steps below you will be well on your way to learning how to relax. This exercise should take about 15-20 minutes. However, if you only have 5 minutes to spare, 5 minutes is certainly better than nothing.
Choose a comfortable chair in a place which is free from noise and interruptions (make sure you take the phone off the hook). You may need to explain to your family what you are doing so that they will not disturb you. Telling your family may also reduce any embarrassment you may feel.

Try to clear you mind of all worries or disturbing thoughts. If these worries or thoughts drift back into your mind while you are relaxing, don’t worry, and just push them gently out of your mind again. Let your mind be clear and calm.

Breathe in for 3 seconds and breathe out for 3 seconds, thinking the word relax every time you breathe out. Let your breathing flow smoothly. Imagine the tension flowing out of your body each time you breathe out.

For each of the muscle groups in your body, tense the muscle for 7-10 seconds, then relax for up to 10 seconds. Relax your muscles like the following:
Hands- curl hands into fists, and then relax
Lower arms – bend your hand down at the wrist as though you were trying to touch the underside of your arm, and then relax
Upper arms – tighten your biceps by bending your arm at the elbow, and then relax
Shoulders – lift your shoulders up as if trying to cover your ears with them, and then relax
Neck – stretch your neck gently to the left then forward then to the right then to the back in a slow rolling motion, then relax.
Forehead and scalp- raise your eyebrows, and then relax
Eyes – screw up your eyes, and then relax
Jaw- clench your teeth (just to tighten the muscles), then relax
Tongue- press your tongue against the roof of your mouth, and then relax
Chest – breathe in deeply to inflate your lungs, then breathe out, and then relax
Stomach – push your tummy out to tighten the muscle, and then relax
Upper back – pull your shoulder forward with your arms at your side, and then relax
Lower back – white sitting lean your head and upper back forward, rolling your back into a smooth arc thus tensing the lower back, and then relax
Buttocks – tighten your buttocks, and then relax
Thighs – while sitting, push your feet firmly into the floor, and then relax
Calves- lift your toes off the ground towards your shins, and then relax
Feet – gently curl your toes down so that they are pressing into the floor, and then relax.

Take some slow breathes while you sit still for a few minutes enjoying the feeling of relaxation



Staff Alumni
Oh my gosh! Thanks for sharing this, Esther!

I used to see a psychologist downtown, and one time in late 2009 I was really nervous about this upcoming piano audition, and he pretty much had me lay down on the sofa and do an abbreviated version of this. Pretty much the same thing! It was out of some book he had, and ahhh.. cool beans is all I gotta say! :thumbup:

It did help me feel relaxed for sure.


Staff Alumni
here is some quick relaxation tips that i found :)

Often we find ourselves in situations where we become tense and it would be inappropriate to lie down and take half an hour to relax. There are certain techniques that we can use in such situations known as – tension-breakers—
These techniques are best used when sitting comfortably in chairs.
Close your eyes and quieten your thoughts. Take a few minutes to get in touch with what is going on inside of you –your body and your mind… concentrate on your breathing for a few minutes – feel your chest as it rises and falls, feel the air as it comes in and out. Each time you breathe out let the body relax a little more.
1) With your eyes closed, gently massage your neck with your hands. Help the muscles of your neck to relax by gently massaging them. Now smooth out your forehead with your fingertips. Starting from the center of your forehead and moving outwards… with your fingertips, gently run your fingers from the bridge of your nose outwards across your checks to your temples, all the time telling yourself to relax.
2) You should be comfortably seated in your chair with your arms resting gently in your lap. Now using “self-talk” to assist you to relax, say to yourself:
- My left arm is heavy and warm (repeat)
- My right arm is warm and heavy (repeat)
- My face is cool and calm and relaxed (repeat)
- I am calm and relaxed (repeat)
3) Let the numbers 1-6 float through your mind one by one. Shut out everything else. Relax a little more each time you think of the number. Just let the number float in, the higher the number the more you allow yourself to relax more. Your mind should be calm and quiet and you should feel more relaxed and confident

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