So I have been reading The World Only God Knows.* I really liked the anime and no surprise I am really enjoying the manga... even if these first couple of chapters are just a recap of the anime.* Anyway, I probably should give this a rest when I am on a depression swing.* The main character in this manga is reminding me of who I once was, and in many ways wish to be again.
*
The main character of this manga calls himself the god of conquest.* He is basically a master of dating sim games.* He runs his own website and proclaims there is no girl that he cannot conquer.*** Through circumstances.... he ends up having to use these skills to capture real life girls... I put up the link a description is there.* Anyway, in this manga he will lapse into depressions.* Where he will just lose himself in games.
*
Basically he will just play games 24 hours a day, despite having to go to school.* Anyway, this is the kind of person I used to/want to be.* A person who can just deny reality.* Of course that is why this is a work of fiction.* I am coming as close as I can to this.* I am trying to run my own opinion based website on anime.* I do what I have to do to survive and support the site... but otherwise I wish I could just lock myself away again.* If I could dedicate my work day to watching anime.* I could probably put up my video game review site that I have been longing to do.
*
Anyway, I have been pretty hooked on making my site successful recently.* I have been doing my best to keep up with the... god 15 or so new animes that have come out for the summer season.* By dedicating myself to this.* I forget everything else that is going on in the world.* The only thing I tend to remember is my fitness.* Then I am back home watching anime and making improvements to my website.* I get so distracted I forget everything around me.* Even my lust... one thing that really drives me to depression.* Then I crash back down to reality when I realize what it would take to get me to the point of only watching anime.
*
When I look at it, there are two ways.* The easy way would be to win a three hundred million dollar lotto jackpot.* I could work for two more years and then quit my job.* Then I could move away.* I could buy a house in a semi-populated area and I could just isolate myself and throw myself into my work.* That is the safest way to do this.... then there is the other way.* I could put tons of effort into my site and start trying to gain ad revenue.* Then once I make enough to survive... I could quit my job and be full time anime critic... However, I would have to struggle to keep myself interesting.* It can be a challenge since my writters block comes and goes.* Some days I can write books.* Other days I can barely form sentences.* Given peoples ADD... well it becomes challenging to keep up with their demand for content.
*
If only I could lose myself in something like that.* However, it is hard to really dedicate myself to being a critic... I can only write so many opinions and reviews in one day... I can only watch anime for so long in one day, especially the REALLY bad ones.* Maybe that is my problem... I lack passion about anything... when I get frustrated I move onto something else... I don't know... maybe I should just kill myself... after all, in a few years most people would consider me dead anyway.
*
Why am I thinking so much?* Maybe I just need to get some sleep.* According to my sleep stats program I have accumulated almost 10 hours of sleep debt in the last month... in the past 3 months I have accumulated over 40 hours... and well the further I go back the more I have.* Granted I have so much to accomplish... it is hard to find time to sleep for 10 hours a day to start to make up the debt... I don't know... what is the point?* Maybe I can kill myself with exhaustion...
*
The main character of this manga calls himself the god of conquest.* He is basically a master of dating sim games.* He runs his own website and proclaims there is no girl that he cannot conquer.*** Through circumstances.... he ends up having to use these skills to capture real life girls... I put up the link a description is there.* Anyway, in this manga he will lapse into depressions.* Where he will just lose himself in games.
*
Basically he will just play games 24 hours a day, despite having to go to school.* Anyway, this is the kind of person I used to/want to be.* A person who can just deny reality.* Of course that is why this is a work of fiction.* I am coming as close as I can to this.* I am trying to run my own opinion based website on anime.* I do what I have to do to survive and support the site... but otherwise I wish I could just lock myself away again.* If I could dedicate my work day to watching anime.* I could probably put up my video game review site that I have been longing to do.
*
Anyway, I have been pretty hooked on making my site successful recently.* I have been doing my best to keep up with the... god 15 or so new animes that have come out for the summer season.* By dedicating myself to this.* I forget everything else that is going on in the world.* The only thing I tend to remember is my fitness.* Then I am back home watching anime and making improvements to my website.* I get so distracted I forget everything around me.* Even my lust... one thing that really drives me to depression.* Then I crash back down to reality when I realize what it would take to get me to the point of only watching anime.
*
When I look at it, there are two ways.* The easy way would be to win a three hundred million dollar lotto jackpot.* I could work for two more years and then quit my job.* Then I could move away.* I could buy a house in a semi-populated area and I could just isolate myself and throw myself into my work.* That is the safest way to do this.... then there is the other way.* I could put tons of effort into my site and start trying to gain ad revenue.* Then once I make enough to survive... I could quit my job and be full time anime critic... However, I would have to struggle to keep myself interesting.* It can be a challenge since my writters block comes and goes.* Some days I can write books.* Other days I can barely form sentences.* Given peoples ADD... well it becomes challenging to keep up with their demand for content.
*
If only I could lose myself in something like that.* However, it is hard to really dedicate myself to being a critic... I can only write so many opinions and reviews in one day... I can only watch anime for so long in one day, especially the REALLY bad ones.* Maybe that is my problem... I lack passion about anything... when I get frustrated I move onto something else... I don't know... maybe I should just kill myself... after all, in a few years most people would consider me dead anyway.
*
Why am I thinking so much?* Maybe I just need to get some sleep.* According to my sleep stats program I have accumulated almost 10 hours of sleep debt in the last month... in the past 3 months I have accumulated over 40 hours... and well the further I go back the more I have.* Granted I have so much to accomplish... it is hard to find time to sleep for 10 hours a day to start to make up the debt... I don't know... what is the point?* Maybe I can kill myself with exhaustion...
