Resentment

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by NoNamesPlease, May 21, 2016.

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  1. NoNamesPlease

    NoNamesPlease Well-Known Member

    I'm feeling very resentful of my mother. I am 50 years old, she is 70. She has been mentally ill for as long as I can remember and also a drug addict. I have had depression for as long as I can remember. I sought treatment when I was 20 years old finally.

    I have always been the more responsible one in the family, the one who always kept a job and help other people out. I feel as if I've been taking care of my mother since I was a child. Now that she is older and in failing health, I resent the hell out of having to take care of her. I do not have any support from the rest of the family because she has alienated the rest of them. Many family members won't speak to me because I stay in contact with her.

    Most of the time I feel like I raised myself. I hate myself for feeling resentful of an old woman who is sick. I have no children, mainly because I did not want 2 be the type of parent she was. I know that when I'm her age I will have no one. It's one of the things that brings me to thinking of suicide almost everyday.
     
  2. Rockclimbinggirl

    Rockclimbinggirl SF climber Staff Member Safety & Support

    Welcome to the forum @NoNamesPlease
    *hugs* Are you still getting help for the depression?
    What about friends?
     
  3. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hi there, I am sorry you are going through this. What is her diagnosis? You have a right to feel the way you do and your mom is very lucky to have you :) Are you seeing a therapist?
     
  4. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    Hi I am so sorry you are going through this. I wish there was some kind of support group in your area for people who are care givers to parents. I can read how rough you have had it being the only person taking responsibility. I hope that somehow you will find support locally. I know you can find support here
     
    MisterBGone likes this.
  5. NoNamesPlease

    NoNamesPlease Well-Known Member

    Thank you. I am getting health insurancevsooncand can go back on meds and therapy.

    Mom is borderline, and bipolar
     
  6. NoNamesPlease

    NoNamesPlease Well-Known Member

    Than
    Thank you. I'm really needing the support today. Boyfriend just tells me to quit being a p****
     
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