<edit mod total eclipse timeline > I can't take this. What did I do in this live to deserve this. Why do I keep coming back this over and over. My therapist isnt helping me, he's making it worse. I will ask him how do I get out of these bad feelings/ thought. And he always sais you know yourelf better then anyone else so I have to find it in myself to seek the answers. Wtf. I freaken hate him. I want to smash his face in. I don't want to live another minute. It's 4 in the morning and I have no one to call that wouldn't be mad that I called so dam early. I hate calling the suicide hotline they just piss me off even more. I'm screaming my heart out. I don't want to feel this way any more.