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Running away at December,15 12:00 AM Thursday.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by torcheredartist, Dec 14, 2011.

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  1. torcheredartist

    torcheredartist New Member

    So i probably should have posted something on the forums sooner, but i guess now is better then never. I am 16 years old. and I've been depressed since i was 6 years old. it wasn't so bad at the time but eventually it got worse, by the time I was 10 it became horrible it's when I got to the "depressed haze state" . I was so depressed and i just didn't care what happened to me. I always had this little hope of maybe one day things will get better, but really they just got much MUCH worse. It got so bad I started going mentally insane, around 15, but I was still able to act pretty convincingly casual about things as much as it killed me inside. now I just can't stand it any longer. I'm running away from home 12:00 AM Thursday. I figure things won't change by staying here they will only get worse, as they always have. all I remember about my life at school is being yelled at by teachers and being made fun of by students, even now that kinda applies. now I have horrible grades because I just don't care. so i know I'll never full fill any of my dreams. if i can even get a job in the first place. and a childhood friend who barely knows me anymore... I knew them since I was really young and was the only reason my life was worth living for so long. they where the only person who treated me nicely and accepted me for who I was when it felt like the world was against me... and even though I have friends now, It feels like there just so artificial. It's a really depressing because they barely see me as a friend, and and i feel like I know her more then that... I feel like i might even love her. even though we both agreed that we didn't love each other at one time, we both thought it would be weird but... things changed... I also can't stand the type of person I turned into, It's the type of person I hate. I honestly don't care about getting a job at all, living a life past high school, or really even living threw the next few days... I feel cocky about writing this but it's better then not saying something at all can someone save me please! I'm sorry if you got to this to late.
  2. Mogwai02

    Mogwai02 Active Member

    don't run away, seek help. can you confide in your parents or other family members? you're so young. wait until you're in your late twenties before you make any permanent decisions about your life.
  3. 1Lefty

    1Lefty Well-Known Member

    Are you receiving any treatment now? That's probably your best option. If you feel suicidal or think you might harm yourself or someone else, you can go to a hospital emergency room for help (at least in the US).

    If you think living is unpleasant now, it will be worse if you run away.

    Your problems will continue even if you run away.

    Get some kind of help, even if it means starting with a school counselor.
  4. 1Lefty

    1Lefty Well-Known Member

    I hope you're reading this, and have reconsidered your plan to run away.

    You're welcome here, we care.
  5. nonopano

    nonopano Active Member

    Dear friend,

    running way is not the solution. Running way is just like running away from your problems. The harshest part is that the problem will still catch you up.

    Anyway, facing up the root of your problem is the only solution you have. Doing nothing will just make it stay and cause more pain. I understand why you keep to yourself. It is indeed embarassing to tell this problem to others. However, you have to understand that opening this up to others is the only solution.

    I am glad that you've hit this forum. I actually believe that you're a step closer to solving your problem by opening up here. Please feel free to share us your problems, and consider our advice.
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