I am depressed. Have been fighting it for 10 years. I have lost my job because of this multiple times. Now I have lost my home, my car, almost everything. I am staying with my daughter in a extra room. I have no money, insurance, or hope. The fear of hell & hurting my loved ones used to keep me from harming myself. I am starting to not believe in hell or maybe just not care. I did not ask for this screwed up life. If I kill myself out in the wilderness maybe no one will ever find me. I am not sure I want to die but I am absolutely sure I want the pain to stop.