I don't really know where to begin. I have never really talked about how I feel. Nobody in my life knows. I have never been on a forum like this before either. I'm just a sad girl. I have a wonderful family, and lots of friends. But at the end of the day nobody knows me. nobody knows what I am feeling, and what I think about. I look happy to everybody. I smile, I make jokes. I live. But that's not me. It hurts my heart to get up every morning. I don't even know what I am trying to say. I don't like expressing how I feel. But I can't deal with it anymore. I feel silly writing this. But I don't know what to do.