Safe boxes

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by Isa, Dec 22, 2007.

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  1. Isa

    Isa Well-Known Member

    I thought I'd posted this here already but I cant find it, or anyone elses post about it. so.

    Harming is a form of escapism, to help us keep control over our pain and escape from it sort of. Therefore it will ALWAYS be a temptation for most people who have self harmed for long periods of time. You cant wait until you dont need self harm to stop as self harm causes a vicious cycle, you find yourself depressed because you have scars and then scarring yourself because your depressed.

    To begin with accept token victories. If you last two days, or even two hours if your that extreme currently, then note to yourself that you went that long without it, if you slip up tell yourself you were stressed and needed the control but it doesnt mean you dont want to stop any more, keep reminding yourself of goals.

    Two useful things that have helped some people

    1) a happy box, a shoe box full of things that make you happy, photos cds etc for when you feel like you might cut in the near future, to distract you until the feeling passes, this helps you by giving you an anchor, things to think about to distract yourself, and hopefully some positive feelings. You wont feel happiness in the traditional sense looking at them when you are feeling low, but it might be enough to help... if not...

    2) a "safe box", in the safe box keep sterilising fluid, your razors or whatever so that when you cut you clean the skin, then cut with clean blades, then clean it again so it becomes more like a medical procedure rather than a romantic ideal of escapism. The more you think of it as a medical procedure that sometimes you have to endure in order to continue functioning, and less like an escape from the stress of life that you hide in, the less tempting it becomes.

    The second part sounds crazy doesn't it? Advising you to make it easier on yourself to cut.. But its not. The safe box helps you because a) it saves you from infections and having to answer nasty questions from doctors or families and getting sick.. and b) it stops self harm being a spur of the moment or emotion fueled thing.. it means you have to think about what you are doing. It means you arent 'escaping' your pain by self harming, just like a diabetic has a shot of insulin sometimes you might have to to get control over your emotions.. it helps you stop idealising the self harm.. the self harm wont help you get over your problems, its just a means to control yourself when you absolutely have to, to get through another day. And every day you survive is an achievement.

    It takes time but keep reminding yourself that you want to give up and the little goals you achieve.

    Good luck!
  2. thedeafmusician

    thedeafmusician Staff Alumni

    I remember reading this somewhere when I first joined... but iono who posted it. Either way, its great that you posted it again hun - because the newer people can read it. I actually did both those boxes.. they are very helpful. Thankyou for posting this hun. :hug: :hug:

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