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Sandwich generation

Discussion in 'Mid Life and Getting Older' started by Gloomy eeyore, Feb 17, 2017.

  1. Gloomy eeyore

    Gloomy eeyore Well-Known Member

    My friends tell me I have reached middle age. I turned 40 in November. Now I am dealing with aging parents and raising my 12 year old son as a single parent. I struggle with bipolar and depression. It all seems so overwhelming. When the depression is really bad it seems like everyone else needs me more and I don't have time for myself. My dad has dementia and my mom is getting verbally abusive towards him. I feel like I need to quit my job to take care of him. My son is special needs and is running into a lot of trouble at school because he has poor social skills. People tell me to take care of myself, but my parents really rely on me. If it wasn't for my son I don't think I could hang on. Sometimes it feels like there is no good reason to be around. I am so overloaded with responsibility I can't handle any more. I forget to mention I went back to college to finish my degree.
     
  2. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    Sorry to hear that you are going through this.

    If you are in the US or Canada, you may want to try calling 211 or visiting www.211.org

    They can help with a bunch of different issues and services.

    It might be best for your dad to go into some kind of elderly care facility.

    I don't have a whole lot else to offer right now, that's about the best I can do.

    I'm wishing for good things to happen in your life and the lives of your family though
     
    PaladinofKnights likes this.
  3. Walker

    Walker Everything Zen Staff Member Safety & Support SF Social Media SF Supporter

    It's tough when you're stuck between the kids and the parents.
    Can you afford to get any outside help? ha! I know, wishful thinking, right? I know I wish I could.
    You do need to remember to care for yourself though. Without you your son has nothing. What would happen to him if you were gone? Foster care? Fuck that.
    What would happen to your parents? Ailing parents would end up split apart from each other, likely or put into homes. You don't want that for them, I think.
    You keep hanging in there but please do take care of yourself. It's necessary.
     
    Karlski and PaladinofKnights like this.
  4. Sneaze

    Sneaze Member

    This is so hard! I don't know where you live but I agree with May 71. You need support. Call and call. Be the sqeaky wheel. I know on bad days you dont even have the energy to do that, but when you have a litte energy, put it all into getting support for you!

    Take care.
     
    may71 and PaladinofKnights like this.