saturday night

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by andyc68, Dec 10, 2007.

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  1. andyc68

    andyc68 Guest

    last week was the worst ever, i finally hit rock bottom.
    i started taking my meds and all week i felt myself getting lower and drifting away, getting more anxious,nervous and paranoid with each day.

    lastly my mind cleared and on saturday i spent a nice day with my kids, i took them home then i went home.
    i checked on my partner or ex as she is and her girls, they were watching tv.
    i then slipped out and drove to a place i have rented, started drinking and got all my pills out and was ready to go.
    at the last minute my friend found me and stopped me before i could do it.

    my ex had found the note and my will that i had left and called him and he saved me. everyone was crying and it was the worst feeling ever to see how close i had come and the effect it had on those i care about.

    now i need to sort my head out and recover from this, maybe i need to be more selfish, dunno.
    all i know is i can't get that bad again.
    long road but i need to travel it and see what happens.
  2. Bograt

    Bograt Active Member

    Well, we are here for you, Andy. Many times I have been pulled back from the abyss by my wife, and the though of how badly it would hurt her and my family if I went through with some of my plans. You just need something to hold onto when you are being swept away by your feelings. For me, its my wife. For you it could be your kids, your friends or any number of things. Heck, I'd stay around just for another pint of Guinness, but where I work alcohol is a no-no. (nor do I endorse turning to drinking to solve your problems, I jut reeeealy like my Guinness!)
  3. RySp123

    RySp123 Guest

  4. silent_enigma

    silent_enigma Well-Known Member

    Just so you know antidepressants can make you feel worse before they actually start to do their job.
  5. taranama

    taranama Well-Known Member

    do they really??? that defeats the whole purpose of anti-depressants....right?? :huh:
  6. incombustible2000

    incombustible2000 Well-Known Member

    some anti deppressents might not be right for you too, some may make you feel worse, and not better, so keep an eye on how they are making you feel, and then if you need to try something different check with a doctor and see what else you can try.
  7. taranama

    taranama Well-Known Member

    you could always keep a journal of how you are feeling to show your GP or whoever is in charge of helping you get better :)
  8. SoulRiser

    SoulRiser Well-Known Member

    Antidepressants are like a bandage on cancer. They mask the symptoms but don't cure the problem (unless the only problem is brain chemistry imbalance, but most of the time there's a reason why people feel bad). But yeah, different people have different brains, so different antidepressants affect them in different ways, or so I've heard. Gotta try different ones I guess.

    Glad your ex found you though :)
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