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saying goodbye

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Hidan, Dec 14, 2010.

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  1. Hidan

    Hidan Member

    Next week im going to drive to see my maybe ex to see her one last time before i go, obviously i wont be telling her im going to blow myself away, i just want her to see her face cuz thats the last thing ill be thinking when i leave this world
  2. me myself and i

    me myself and i Account Closed

    Do you really want to hurt her this much?
    Sometimes relationships are just are not meant to be, sometimes just letting go is all you can do.
    Maybe go and see your doctor or talk it over with a friend.
    Killing yourself is not the answer, helping make the pain go away, is.
    Please hang around and post and listen a little, many here understand.
    Regards Pete
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I hope also you can reach out and get some therapy for yourself some help to move on now with your life. Time to heal you okay No need to leave just get some help to get rid of the pain and sadness. Who knows maybe you will find someone else as you move forward.
  4. Infortunatus

    Infortunatus Guest

    Why let some other person determine whether you live or die? Stop thinking about her and start thinking about you. Maybe you deserve to live no matter what other people decide to do. Take control of your own fate.
  5. Hidan

    Hidan Member

    Im not thinking about her, to be honest i dont want her, its what ive done, and the fact that she says shes pregnant and i dont know if shes lying or not she is 2 hours away drive. I cant be a dad if she is and if shes not i cant live with this guilt.
  6. luka

    luka Active Member

    hey hidan, im luka and im a 44 year old man currently in the army

    i grew up homeless and without a father, my father left my mom afew weeks after i was born, it hurts me sometimes thinking about it but i know one thing for sure, if i had the chance to meet my father, i would. even for just afew minutes, i want to know what he was like and the kind of man he is, i dont think ill eveer understand what he was going through when i was a baby and what he was thinking but no matter what i think my life would have been so much better if i had a father figure in my life.

    i wish you would reconsider changing your mind because i know your going to be a great dad, you cant choose whether your gonna be a good dad or not, it just happens. the last thing your ex wants is for you to commit suicide and hurt her more, its hard on you but have you thought about her feelings and the baby?

    i dont know who you are but i can gurantee you being a father is the best thing in life, someone to teach your boy the ropes of life, teach him your values and discipline, something your gonna be proud of

    i hope i had a impact on your life my friend

  7. Hidan

    Hidan Member

    luka the thing is im not sure she is pregnant, i havent talked to her in atleast a month, she never even had the guts to break up with me,she still hasnt, last time i talked to her she said she had pictures of the baby, im thinking of driving there 2 hrs away to find the truth, ive gotten advice that i shouldnt, or that i should write but im not that kind of person, i need to see things for myself. i can go on wondering if im a dad or not, and i cant live like that
  8. Serbian

    Serbian Active Member

    Hidan, don't do it, man. Imagine if your child becomes depressed one day, because of never meeting you? I'm willing to bet fatherhood might even fulfill your life. Hang in there.
  9. luka

    luka Active Member

    then you should go see =] report back with some updates

    good luck
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