Scared of the feeling coming back.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by mlxjaded, Dec 23, 2009.

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  1. mlxjaded

    mlxjaded Well-Known Member

    So I just started taking anti-depressants (literally two days ago) and they have been working! I don't care if it's all in my head or if the pills are actually working, I don't feel horrible/suicidal anymore.

    I'm feeling okay, not great, but okay. My scars are starting to heal. And I'm looking ahead.

    But in the deep deep back of my head I am worried about the suicidal thoughts coming back.

    I love SF and I know I can come here for support whenever I need it but I just don't want those thoughts to come back stronger.

    What do you guys think?
  2. corang

    corang Well-Known Member

    I know how you feel. Ive been happy for a few months but Im still afraid of the thoughts coming back. I think Ill always be afraid of them coming back but if I keep doing what Im supposed to and get the right help they most likely wont. As for your medication it takes them several weeks to fully work but that doesnt mean you wont see an immediate reaction. Ive had that too with some meds where they work almost immediately.

    I hope you keep improving and if you ever wanna talk feel free to PM me.
  3. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    I think that is a real fear for anyone that is moving forward. The fear because they know how deep those thoughts and pain can go. And I think it is also normal. It gives you something to aim for. To try and quiet those fears by working at moving forwards and not falling backwards.

    I'm glad that you have found meds that are working. And I'm glad that you are moving forward right now. So instead of thinking about the past and the feelings, focus completely on where you are now and where you're heading. Dont leave any room for the negative stuff. Drowned it out with all the positive. And you can always post here if the thoughts and feelings try to squeeze back in. Keep looking at the good hun.
  4. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Talk to your doctor and find out if there are any support groups there that you can attend..It soundss like you talked to someone to get put on meds.. Maybe talking in a support group would help you to feel free of those thoughts all together..I'm glad that you are on a positive path..You always have us..
  5. deferred dream

    deferred dream Well-Known Member

    I understand how you feel. Every time I take a step forward, I am terrified of falling back into my old, sorrowful habits. Don't let fear of falling back become a self-fulfilling prophecy though. You can do this!
  6. mlxjaded

    mlxjaded Well-Known Member

    Thank you all soo much for the kind words. :hug:
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