Recently, I've been doing a lot of thinking. Thinking about the future and it scares me. My sister is 23 so it probably won't be long until she moves out or gets married. It scares me that one day she'll leave and I'll be alone. All this thinking started because my family is going on "vacation" this week. Although, it's not really a vacation for me. The whole time is just nonstop suffering, being forced to spend quality 'family time' which is mostly just hearing my mom complain the whole trip. The only thing I enjoyed was joking and having fun with my sister on these trips. But, this time, she decided to stay home. I'm scared because she's growing up. She's moving on. And it scares me that I depend on her to make this family bearable. One day, everyone I know is going to die. Possibly before me or after. I don't want to be around knowing that one day they'll just leave me. And I don't know why I cry so much thinking about this stuff. I shouldn't because its far into the future, but I still don't know why it's bothering me so much. Why can't I just live with it and move on?