Scared

[Florence]

Hello
I am very nervous and scared about being here
I do need to do something though because I have never been in a darker place than I am right now, noteven years ago when I was hospitalised.
Not sure how I get through each day. Worried of talking to my gp about upping the meds again as I run a risk of being sectioned if I am truly honest.
just find it so hard to live with the pain.
It's like breathing through cotton wool.
So I am reaching out here and hoping you won't mind me joining

 

[lostbutnotfound]

Hi Florence

Welcome to SF. I hope you find the kindness and support you deserve. Please keep posting and let us try and help

:hug:

 

[Florence]

Thank you
I have reached the point where nothing is worth continuing with. I went to my gp and they have offered me CBT via telephone ... Disaster!
So tired
Just want the pain to stop ... Emotional pain that is.
Nice to get such a quick reply

 

[lostbutnotfound]

A lot of people here feel the same way, so people will understand, and listen, whenever you need support. I know it is really hard, and frightening feeling this way, but please keep fighting. Are you on any medication for mental health? And is there any chance you can go back to your GP and explain that you would prefer another option besides CBT via telephone? Have you received therapy before?

Just remember that here is somewhere that you will be understood, and cared about, and we will all try and help :hug:

 

[Florence]

Have managed to get appt with my GP for later today.
Am on 40mg citalopram but its just not working, helped for about 3 weeks once I got to 40mg but now back to worse than before I started.
Have got a counsellor I can see and am booked in again on wed ... only just told him bout my suicidal feelings, very scary owning up to it.
Will tell GP bout rubbish telephone counselling.
Very shaky all the time and just want to jump, but keep getting through those real despair moments but they are getting stronger and more frequent.

thanks for being there

 

[lostbutnotfound]

I'm really glad to hear you managed to get an appointment with your GP. Can you discuss the possibility of changing your medication? As you said the citalopram isn't working for you, and if you can find a medication that does, it really could make all the difference.
It is also good that you have a counselor, and I know it is scary talking about how you really feel, but please try continuing to do so, as it is important for him to know the full story so he can help you more
I really do understand how frightening it all is, feeling this way, and not feeling in control of it. I also know it's really difficult to admit to people just how bad you are feeling, but the only way they can offer proper advice is if they know the full story hon.

You are doing REALLY well. Please try and keep that in mind. It doesn't feel that way, I know, but you really are :hug:

 

[Kiba]

:hug: I hope you are able to get the help you need. And also welcome to the forums.

 

[Florence]

Hello Swift, thank you for the welcome.

I went to the GP and am weaning offthe citalopram, starting trazadone from Saturday.

Also signed off work for a week.

I guess that gives me a goal to hang on to ...

 

[lostbutnotfound]

I'm glad you managed to talk about your medication, and hope that the trazadone will be more beneficial to you than the citalopram was
Also, it's positive that you have been signed off work, gives you a bit of time for you right now, to focus on your needs.
Did you talk about the therapy options?