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Scars, shame and ruined relationships

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I first attempted suicide several years ago, thought id worked through it and was left only dealing with a scared wrist which made me feel embarrassed when i could clearly see someone had noticed it then did their best not to look like they had... or someone was direct enough to ask about it.

About 4 weeks ago i tried several times over the course of a week, both wrists this time, far worse than before, and seriously overdosing on different things on seperate occasions.

Everyone that knew about my previous attempt thought i was ok. I had repeatedly told people i was ok. Id lied. The reaction now is one of masked disgust. People are trying to be really nice about it, but i can tell they are horrified. Not that i blame them. My arms are an absolute mess, i hate looking at them. They look horrible. I try and keep them covered even when im alone as i find them amazingly triggering. They are a permenant cause of shame for me. The whole series of events are. My family dont trust me at all, they clearly try make sure someone is in the house as much as possible so im not left alone which is indescribably humiliating.

Hardly a story of suicide survival.

More like suicide failure.

total eclipse

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Staff Alumni
Hugs to you hun there should be no shame hun okay YOu were in pain and wanted it to end YOu chose the wrong way that all YOu needed to reach out to someone hun go to hospital call crisis line Self harm is just one coping skill that seems to help decrease the pain but yes the scars remain I do hope you can get some therapy hun to help you cope in a different way
The scars can be reduced with cream from pharmacy ask about it okay but no please know don't be ashamed hun okay we understand and certainly do not judge anyone here hugs


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Have you ever thought of tattoos hun, i have a sort of rose and swirls on my forearm and it covers a few scars, even a bubbly one! I get compliments on it! much better than the looks and questions i used to get hun. might be worth looking into, big hugs xxx


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Mine healed great, no different to the tattoo around it only slightly raised, the guy i went to hadn't done scars before but he was so pleased with how mine healed that he covered one of his own scars: a burn and that healed well too. Some tattooists don't like to, dunno why x
Seriously thats really good to know as thats pretty much the perfect way to cover them up. Actually pleased to hear this so thank you! I hate looking atthem as they are. Hmmm need to get thinking about options. Its kind of an hard lace just to get them on their own, have to go for some kind of a sleave on each i guess x


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i have put a pic of mine up as my avatar, i can extend the swirls anywhere i want, add roses ect to cover other scars aswell. my main scar is under the rose x
That looks really good! I could only see the pic at that size, but from what i can see they've done a really good job. I couldnt actually see the scaring at all :) So pleased you told me that, i had it in my head for some reason it wouldnt take well but that looks great!! x


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Glad i could help hun, it still does depend on where the scars are mind, if they are over a vein that's too close too the surface ect but you can still design something that will run along side so it takes the attention away from the scar, good hunting for a nice tattoo hun x
Hmmmm ok, may have a bit of an issue there then. Really need to speak to a tattooist and see if they would be able to do something i guess x
A good tattooist will see you in person - and work with you - suggesting a few things when you have your own original idea.

A decent tattooist - accredited - will do a wonderful job on scars - actually using them to make the tattoo really cover things up.

Good luck.

Tattoos are fantastic.

Wanted to buy the actually machine and have a go myself - do my legs - test it out. But you need to spend a few quid buying a good tattoo machine and generator - plus expensive inks that actually last a lifetime.


Here is why you use a good tattooist - local one - I use woman who has all her work online - and is fully trained - and very hygienic. Not cheap - but I'd cheerfully pay a few hundred quid on scars - then you could wear a t shirt again - or short sleeved shirt in the summer.

Bad tattoos... http://www.badtattoos.com/
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