Scary thoughts

[mpang123]

I don't know why my thoughts just go from one extreme to another in such a short time. Just a few hours ago, I was thinking so positively and filled with inspiration and gratitude over life. Now, I suddenly had this thought that I will commit suicide tonight because I know what I am going to do. However, the only thing keeping me away from doing myself in is that I want to receive my delivery of my electronic cigarettes on Monday. Doesn't that sound crazy? What will happen when I receive my package Monday? Will I attempt it then? I really don't sound logical and I feel I'm going against my own beliefs. I'm so confused. I really want to kill myself but my guilty conscience is preventing me to but I don't know how much longer I'm going to last. I hate my brain.

 

[total eclipse]

Hun you like many of us have suicidal ideation which are just thoughts that come into our brains and overwhelm us with wanting to leave It will pass hun that thought will pass as it always has and i hope soon you will feel better hugs Just know we are here ok you are not alone

 

[mpang123]

I'm so tempted. I want to throw away all my reasonsto live so iI can complete my plan.

 

[total eclipse]

Don't do it ok you have people that care for you and need you so please stay strong stay safe

 

[flowers]

As much as I want to die, I also think I am here for a reason. Of course I dont know the reason. But i just get the feeling that taking my own life would not be a very good idea. Also I have heard many stories from people about how they caused a lot of physical harm to themselves with an attempt. And that harm made life even worse. I do know about the feeling of wanting to die. But what if this life is for a reason. And I cut it short? Then what? So I stay. For me it doesnt stop the feelings. I just know it is unlikely that I will act on the feelings, no matter how strong they are. I hope that helps in some way. :hug: