Yay, I'm at school, I'm supposed to study atm but I feel so freaking lonely. I need a hug, I want to die and my arm is so full of cuts :'( I wanna be admitted so that all this can be fixed. I don't want to live anymore like this. Just another 20min and I'll be able to see my class mates again and I guess that this time I will tell them about how I feel 'cus they all are too scared to ask, too scared even to come help and give me a hug, I so definitely need to talk to peeps right now but the school's firewall is blocking sf chat So just another 13 min and I'll be nearly alright. I'm kinda shaking, hope noonee will notice. I'm supposed to go swimming tomorrow but my arm is full of cuts. I showed a real life friend my cuts on cam yesterday, because I wanted her opinion on the swimming pool. She just couldn't believe they were real. I'm ashamed of myself, a bit. Mostly, scared of myself. I don't know what to do and now I notice I still have to wait 23 min! argh. I normally never ask for help, but desperate as I am I'm pretty sure it's gonna happen soon or a lil later. So I'll try to tell them in 20 min how I feel because I've heard from others that they were worried. I can't believe that so I'll just have to check.