Screaming and yelling

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by stuckinchicago6, Mar 3, 2011.

  1. stuckinchicago6

    stuckinchicago6 Well-Known Member

    How do you stop somebody from screaming? Today, I try to tell my mom I want to talk with her calmly. I even sweetly suggest we have a heart to heart talk and the minute I say something she disagrees with, she screams and yells in an almost violent way. Then, I have to raise my voice to either get her to stop or to get my point across. Even when I have broken down in tears and I beg her to stop and I beg her for peace and a hug, the screaming still won't stop. She shouts, "Leave me alone!!" Things were bad before, but never this bad. She has reached an all time high or should I say low? I have thought that maybe if I need to discuss anything serious with her I am better off writing it in a letter. Otherwise I should keep the conversation light. What do you all think?
     
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Your mother's screaming is her problem...I suggest you do not engage in it as you do not feel good about doing it...some people just cannot find comfort within themselves, so they show this to the world in this way...maybe, it is best to accept that she has these problems so you do not expect anything else from her...it is difficult as no one want this from their mother...but, it will also dissappoint you to look to her for anything she cannot give...sorry she treats you this way...you do not deserve it! big hugs, J
     
  3. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    I'm sorry things are so stressful between you and your mom. I'm not sticking up for her in any way but just gonna share something from my own experiences. I know on days when I was at the end of my rope, a houseful of kids that needed attention, food to cook, house to look after, so many responsibilities. Then one of the kids wants to talk or share something. Well, if the conversation got a little heated, my voice rose with it. God knows I didnt want it to go that way. But it did. As a mom, with all that goes with it, just some days things got the better of me. And trust me I always felt so guilty afterwards but my foolish "mom" pride would take over and I wouldnt apologize.

    That was while the ex was still in the picture. You could cut the anger and hostility in our home with a knife in those days. Now I listen, whenever or where ever one of my children ask to talk. We have become more like good friends than mom and child. And we love that things go on much smoother now.

    I think your mom may have a full plate right now and isnt capable of giving 100%. Writing her a letter is a terrific idea. You can say all you need to with no interuptions or screaming matches. She cant say she didnt know when she sees your problems or concerns in black and white before her eyes. And she can pick a time when she can commit to reading it and letting everything sink in.

    Try again hun. Write her that letter. At the end, tell her you'd like to talk to her when she has the time and patience. Good luck!!! :arms: