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Screw you Nature and Media

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by depressedkitty, Oct 24, 2010.

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  1. depressedkitty

    depressedkitty Active Member

    Okay what the hell???? I wouldn't have any issues with food if I didn't have any consequences. Who agree with me???? Basically if fucking god/nature or whatever gave me the most awesome metabolism and body type I wouldn't be in this mess. when I was at my lowest weight 5"4 feet (49kg) I could finally look decent enough in clothes however even when my wieght goes to low 50s Eg 50-54kg its hard to look good and fit into clothes decently. Fuck you Media/fashion industry for making me feel fat even though realistically I am not or having to be be really skinny to look good in anything. I''m over this. Sometimes I wish I was naturally fat anyway so i wouldn't have to worry what I put my my god damn mouth. Or I wish I was a guy so I wouldn''t feel the pressure to look a certain way and what not. Lucky pricks.

    I would luv to hear contributions and feedback to this thread. :stars:

    Sorry for the excessive swearing and what not but I need to vent :eek:hmy:
  2. ~Heather~

    ~Heather~ Well-Known Member

    I know what you mean. Right now I'm hungry but I can't decide if or even what I would like to eat. I have this voice in my head telling me not to eat, that I'll just gain weight. So I end up not eating a whole day and feeling terrible or eating what I think is too much and ridiculing myself for it the rest of the day.

    As far as my genes go my mothers side is really obese one of my aunts is practically bedridden. My fathers side consists of high metabolisms who don't gain weight for anything. So I'm stuck in between constantly worrying I'll end up super over weight though my metabolism naturally keeps me at a weight that isn't ideal but is no where close to fat.
    It doesn't help that when I successfully lose weight and get close to what I aim for my boyfriend tells me I'm too skinny. So then I'm stuck between what I want and what he likes.

    I'm sorry to rant on your rant but I feel the same way! The fashion industry always reminds me that I won't look good in stuff like that and I don't even think I have the bone structure to look right no matter what. I don't have a dainty frame that seems ideal but I have a sturdy looking one. So I'm never happy with my body... :(

    I don't know if this makes a difference but men do get self conscious just not as much as we do. My boyfriend complains about his bird cage chest because he doesn't have pecs. Men view their bodies as having to be strong while girls want to be thin and delicate looking. Obviously guys have something much more attainable regardless of genes but the pressure is still there.

    Sorry if it seems like I ranted too much but your rant made me want to as well :laugh:
  3. KittyGirl

    KittyGirl Well-Known Member

    Guys feel pressure as well.
    Anyone with low self esteem does, really...

    My ex had eating difficulties and wouldn't eat for days sometimes after a big meal because he thought he was looking too bloated or fat.
    ALSO- a big hangup for guys is not looking beefed up and muscular; like dudes in magazines with insane 8packs and no bodyhair.

    I agree about the media screwing us over though...
    But the idea has always been--- 'true' beauty is unattainable. If everyone could look that way, it would just be 'regular' and not 'rare and beautiful' -- it's only because that ideal is pushed down young girl's throats to try and look that way, that it's become a real problem.
  4. Ferret

    Ferret Well-Known Member

    Why haven't I been in a relationship in over two years?

    I guess I'm uglier than I thought.
  5. depressedkitty

    depressedkitty Active Member

    Ace, thanks for all your thoughts and opinions they were very insightful =D Also ~Heather~ its totally cool you can rant in my thread, the more comments and opinions the better plus it helps calm you down you when need to vent :pokeball:

    Yeah I don't have a delicate frame either which is suckage coz I have a body type (Big boobs and Hips) that makes it hard me me to look good in anything unless I get down to a very unhealthy weight and starve. Lame :argh:

    Hmmm I didn't know alot guys faced body image issues too. I thought they gone on with life and didn't care LOL.

    Also it doesn't help when your mum wants you to be a certain weight which is even more pressure. Its bad but I was happier at my 58-64kg range of weight as I did't have to worry about what I ate and I looked decent enough for society. Plus I am not big on fashion anyway. Man I am stuck at the moment :blink:

    On another note I also don't like to read glossy magazines like Cosmopolitan, Cleo and so forth because it makes me feel like crap when I see those girls in the magazines, and my body image is getter bad to the point where I don't want to play the sims 3 anymore because the characters are thinner than me coz I know they are based on real people. Man I am sooooo messed up I don't know how I am living at the moment......................do you ever have one of those days where you want to sleep forever and never wake up??? I feel like that now =(
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 25, 2010
  6. ~Heather~

    ~Heather~ Well-Known Member

    Haha my sims 3 character always turns out looking broad like me :laugh:
    But still much thinner than I actually am.

    I have average boobs but like broader shoulders and thicker hips like I'm meant to be bigger than I am. But who knows I'm never sure what I look like cuz every mirror seems different as such is my perception.

    You may not have noticed that guys get self conscious cuz they don't like anyone knowing their feelings. They hide everything almost automatically. That's another thing pressuring men to be macho and stone hearted being viewed as manly. My boyfriend doesn't even have the ability to cry anymore. But you can tell when he wants to.

    And lonelyd I think it could be you're just specific on your standards which is good it keeps you from getting into a bunch of crappy relationships. I ended up with tons of jerks/idiots before I calmed down and found my current bf. Its almost been two years :sparkle:
  7. LogDork

    LogDork Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    I've had body conscience problems for a long time
    Since I was 13, and had my femur come out the front of my leg, then a big long strip of skin (grafts) taken from my other leg to fill the hole (car hit me)...well, some pretty ugly scars, so I never wear shorts, since then. Shins are pretty scarred from the last 22 years working in the woods/brush.
    My right shoulder looks like it was pulled out of socket, and not put back right, which is basically what I did to it. Plus for about 5 years theres been a goose-egg fatty lypoma in front of it.
    Other than that, I think I would have a decent looking body...
  8. lachrymose27

    lachrymose27 Well-Known Member

    even guys get screwed over by media.
  9. Androgyny

    Androgyny Well-Known Member

    Hey kitty.

    I'll start here, and god knows where this rant will end, but I will start with this fragment.

    Yes, we fucking do. We have these issues to the same degree. Men only seem to show it less simply because it's less socially acceptable to do so. Otherwise, men feel the same pressure to look perfect. To attain an image which is far beyond what many of us are genetically disposed towards.

    But I must take umbridge with your stating that men HAVE to hide it. Yes, it's atypical, but not all of us do. I'm VERY demonstrative of my emotions. It makes me a freak (socially speaking), which makes things harder, but even so, expressing weight and body issues is still a no-no. That is, unless you're a VERY big guy complaining about being being big. If you're not, then it's not commonly accepted. It's why I haven't been able to express this to more than three people in my life. One for each decade. Hmmmm....

    Parental/familial pressure is the worst, but it's even more horrible when you realise that they are as much victims of this societal process as you are. My family are all self-loathing fatties (don't mean to offend anyone, just expressing it the way I know best) and I've felt the pressure from them since day one.

    I've never been THAT big realistically speaking, but because of those pressures, plus media idealisation, I've never ever been able to feel enough within myself. Maybe I never will. I want to look in the mirror and just feel nothing. Not even "I look good".... Just "I am and so what?" that would be the most liberating thing... But it's always evaluation. ALWAYS.

    Kittygirl has a point with not looking beefed up or hairy. I hate it. I can actually gain muscle fairly easily, but don't want it, and I'm far hairier than I'll ever be comfortable with...

    On the upside, whatever your frame, someone is BOUND to find you attractive. I've never honestly met one person who NO-ONE has ever found attractive... and let's face it, that's what it's down to. We want to be attractive, so we're not alone.

    You will find someone, and whatever your body type, someone will have a preference for it. Even if you think your body is the most twisted and fucked up thing imaginable. For example, dkitty & heather - big hips, shoulders, boobs.... VERY attractive! Not trying to hit on anyone, just saying, those kind of attributes tend to be attractive to me.

    If only I'd take some of my own advice and chill out.... But therein lies the problem - the distance between logic and fear. *sigh*
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 4, 2011
  10. LukeH

    LukeH Member

    thought Id just check in to say Im a guy and I do obsess about looking a certain way. I do have a supersonic metabolism and Ive never had problems with weight. i mean ppl tell me Im too skinny but thats just cause they're nosy lol anyway yea basically what Im saying is you can be discontent with the way u look regardless of ur measurements.
  11. Jace

    Jace Active Member

    Guys feel it as well, we all are susceptible to societal pressure especially when it comes to body image.
  12. nolonger

    nolonger Well-Known Member

    Yes, guys can feel it too. It's not generally to be skinny, per se. More like 'buff' or fit. So you have some kids that are doing weights or are on steroids.

    It seems that either you're too fat or you're too fucking skinny. Or you look like you've been hit by a bus or had some sought of flesh eating disease that makes you look like crap.

    You just can't fucking win these days. :dry:
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