Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by SilentMassacre, Aug 25, 2009.

  1. I just started college and it's rough.
    I feel so behind already and it's only the second week.
    I can't keep up and I know that I'm going to fail.
    My manic depressive mood swings are getting worse again.
    I'm supposed to be in therapy every week,
    But I'm lucky if I make it every two.
    I'm waiting for surgery and I'm in pain every day.
    My sister's kidney failure is at it's final stages.
    She skips dialysis and she's very ill right now.
    My job is unbelievably stressful.
    My main manager is amazing, but I don't work with her much.
    I work with the supervisors, and they're tough.
    I'm tired of getting chewed out every time I work.
    I've been having post-traumatic nightmares most nights.
    I can't seem to get a grip on myself.

    To top it off, my bedroom got flooded.
    My brother's washer pipe came loose and flooded,
    The water came down to this apartment.
    The wall is starting to crumble,
    The ceiling is weak,
    And my bed may be ruined now.
    I can't sleep in there because of the black mold.
    The stench is awful.

    I just want to curl up and sleep for a week.
    I need a magic fix, fast.
  2. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    I'm really sorry you're dealing with so much!!
    How many classes are you taking? Would it be possible for you to drop one, or lighten your workload in some way? At least so you can make it to therapy!
  3. Remedy

    Remedy Chat & Forum Buddy

    That's a lot to deal with. Please stick with college though, you can catch up in time. When I dropped out I regretted it so much later. Therapy is also very important... my therapist always tells me health should come over education, feeling better is number one priority. Hopefully after the surgery the pain will go away? Hang in there. Is it possible for you to quit your job while you get everything else sorted? I think that would be a big relief.

    Keep pushing on, over time all the effort you put in now will be so worth it. :hug: Feel free to PM if you ever need to vent.
  4. The only reason I haven't quit my job is because of my main manager.
    And the fact that I'll be pretty much screwed if I quit.

    I don't intend on dropping out... I'll fail first. I'd rather say that I stayed and failed than gave up and ruined all chances of making the shot.

    There's like a 50% chance that the condition will come back, so that will mean repeated surgeries. After this year, I won't have health insurance anymore.

    As far as the room goes, it won't be getting fixed. My bed dried, but it smells horrible and no amount of dousing it with Febreze has helped. I have asthma and I get triggered every time I go back there now. I have nowhere else to sleep in the house (other than the living room floor or the tub) so I've been crashing elsewhere which really screws my schedule up.

    I just want to punch a wall until my hand breaks and bleed.
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    The first few weeks of college is hell but after awhile you will get in a routine get to know what professors want and expect It takes these few weeks just to get organized again. I am sorry you have to deal with everything on top of college i hope you have strength to just carry on. Hope tommorrow is a better day and the next and the next. take care. Glad you camehere for support we are always here when you need help.