Second best.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Sparky777, May 15, 2015.

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  1. Sparky777

    Sparky777 Well-Known Member

    I'm always second best to everyone. Even my fucking best friend.
  2. hide

    hide Member

    what happened ?, if you want to be read , I'll be here for you. :)
  3. Useless

    Useless Active Member

    Right now I'm basically having to say goodbye to my only close friend via txt. After this I won't have a best friend or any friend to be second best to... Oh well. What's done is done and I know how you feel to be treated this way. I am the third child in the family so I've lived second best a long time.
  4. GreySilence

    GreySilence Well-Known Member

    Sometimes people don't get the appreciation they deserve. Yeah- it's totally lame and unfair, but it doesn't mean you're not a great person. Judge your own worth, don't let how other people view you be your means of measurement. You might be someone's #1 someday though! As long as you be yourself, and be very "real", it's bound to happen. Someone who tries to act a certain way to please certain people does not form completely genuine and healthy friendships.

    Like Hide, I also offer my ear (well, eyes) for your problems. If we knew more, we could probably do a lot more to help.

    Hope things get better!
  5. Sparky777

    Sparky777 Well-Known Member

    Long story short, one of my best friends has another best friend. Let's call her friend A. Over the past 4 years my friend told me that I was equal to friend A and that she loved us both equally. I always knew that wasn't true and questioned it. It's only till recently that she confronted me and said that she indeed loves friend A over me but that she still loves me. Just less than friend A. I'm second best to someone I put first. And now I don't know what to do with the friendship. I'm thinking I should keep her as a friend and just learn to love her selflessly but I don't know if that'll kill me one day.
  6. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    gentle :hugs: for you. If you need someone to talk to i'm here.
  7. GreySilence

    GreySilence Well-Known Member

    That's really bad luck, 4 years is a long time to chase after someone and have them choose someone else Dx

    Just because she didn't choose you, don't blame yourself or anything like that. Love comes down to preferences, and Friend A probably lined up with her tastes a bit more unfortunately. It doesn't mean that there's anything wrong with you.

    You should keep her as a friend I think. Adapting to it will be awkward, but I think it will be worth it to keep that friendship. I would give up on any romantic feelings towards her- a one sided love is painful to bear.

    You might feel like she's the only one you'll ever love, but there are a lot of people in the world- you will find someone else to love.
  8. hide

    hide Member

    I once also I was the second , there was a girl I liked when I was 17 years old , I had my best friend and he knew a girl I liked, at a party my best finish friend making out with the girl I liked and I was there , I saw , was a big shock for me, at that time I grab a knife and cut his wrist, vowed never to trust anyone , let alone a friend, in the end my friend 's cheating with another girl, then she sought to me, but I already had closed my heart , eventually did not know anymore about them, but the scar I have on my arm never be effaced , and I remember forever never to trust 100% a friend. At the end you realize that each person will weigh the decisions it takes.

    Find someone else, I assure you
  9. D.I.P.S.C.S

    D.I.P.S.C.S Member

    Sometimes people dont understand us. They dont know what we are going trough. But we need to stand tall.
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