See what happens this time

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by spidy, Nov 11, 2009.

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  1. spidy

    spidy Well-Known Member

    Last fri i went off to kill myself unfortunatly i couldnt get my hands on the rght gear for the job.I have cut my arm up pretty bad which is gunna scar nicely but took the plunge today went and seen my counciller who says not much he can do while im like this so he has rang around to see which docs handle mental illness best.He hoping doc refers me to shrink.Feel like a bloody yoyo.I know all thts going to happen is just different meds and then once they stop working through the whole process again is this ever ending or is this what i have to look forward to forever now i bloody hope not.This bout of feeling suicidle has been really hard to deal with as its been stronger urges but havnt got the plan rght as i dont have what i need for it, 5 days ive been sitting alone trying to figure another way but hvnt the guts on some methods so much can go wrong with them.Really hate feeling like crap and my session today didnt really help.I spilled as much as i could he even noticed my arm and now reckons best thing for me is shrink and i bet my life tht dont really help.
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    depends on the doctor you get not all shrinks just push meds some actually do talk therapy i hope you get a good one to help you with your pain
     
  3. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    I really hope you get a doctor who is willing to listen to you and help you deal with all your pain.

    I'm glad you're still alive. Please keep talking here, whether it's on the forums or through a PM. There are people here who care, and you don't have to go through this alone.
     
  4. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    If you feel something will not help, it is difficult for the provider to help you...maybe being indifferent, because you do not know, can allow you to see what is there for you...best of luck, J
     
  5. spidy

    spidy Well-Known Member

    Could be ive been so negative of late my doc i had never helped me with a follow up plan when i got out of hospital was nt till i ended up in mental ward tht i was told by occ therapist tht i needed to have constant councilling etc.Last few weeks ive been suicidle again but been to scared to go bck to me doc as he makes me feel as thgh im a hinderance.But will see how new doc goes on mon and yes i ll try not be so negative and try let them help.
     
  6. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    You're not a hidrance, and you deserve help. If you feel you're not getting it from one doctor, do what you can to switch doctors and try a new one. I know it's not easy, but your life is worth fighting for.
     
  7. spidy

    spidy Well-Known Member

    Just how i always feel thgh like a hinderance on everybody feel as thgh im just wasting medical resources as there prob ppl more in need than me.I just need to learn to control my thghts somehow as i used to be able to block thngs out so i dont know why im so screwed at doing it now.
     
  8. Chargette

    Chargette Well-Known Member

    Many times I felt like I was a hindrance but please try to remember that this service is for you. They are there to serve you, to help you, to help find solutions with you. It takes time but it is worth it.

    :hug:
     
  9. spidy

    spidy Well-Known Member

    Today has had a bit of a posative outcome my counciller has referred me to a mental health clinic where they look where ya at i have interview tomorrow plus he has wrote letter for new doc i see on mon.Maybe just maybe this weekend i wont go do somethng stupid
     
  10. Tam

    Tam Well-Known Member

    THat's sounding so much better, and something positive to look to. Hang in there Gav. :hug:
     
  11. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    sending you positive vibes for your interview and for your new doc glad you have some hope to hold on to.
     
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