Seems Like it will never happen

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by sadangel, Apr 17, 2013.

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  1. sadangel

    sadangel Active Member

    I thought my world was looking brighter, I thought maybe just maybe I had made it out of this black tunnel. I saw the light. I was so close. Then I slipped and I fell. I can't get it out of my head. I have the how and the why and the notes made out but the when is constantly escaping me. I think maybe I just want attention but then again. I feel no sadness or remorse when I think about it. I want to so bad maybe just maybe tonight will be the night but then again. I have church. Maybe I will make it through. Maybe I should fake sick and stay home I want so badly to be happy. Why can't I be happy? Am I cursed to live forever as a depressed sack of crap? God promises joy everlasting. Why can't I have that? I swear thinks are just going to keep getting worse. I want to stop hurting and stop fighting to find a reason not to do it, I am growing weary and tired. Why am I posting this here? I guess maybe to get the words out since no one is listening anyways. I am sorry for your wasted time reading this. I wouldn't expect you to care. Just a small little thought that is escaping my brain.:miserable:
  2. skinnylove911

    skinnylove911 Well-Known Member

    sending you lots of hugs
  3. Husky

    Husky Well-Known Member

    Sadangel, Thank you for sharing how you're feeling and you're not wasting anybody's time. You know there are people out there who don't like me and I think I've been nothing but nice to them. I have faith, I try to do the right thing but some people's perception of me is mediocre. I ask why this is happening to me. I'm rarely happy and I like you so much want to be. The questions I have for you though is, what would make you happy? What makes you wake up in the morning and say, this is going to be a great day. What was the light you saw and what got you to see that light? I hope that you're feeling a bit better.
  4. Brokenness

    Brokenness Well-Known Member

    Hugs! Is there something you can do to pamper yourself today? Pretend to be your own best friend and give yourself some much needed attention. Maybe a change of scenery? Go out somewhere? I'm so sorry you are feeling this way.
  5. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    I ask the same questions to myself.... which is why when my chosen time comes I am 100% sure that I will do it. After all, I am one of the unworthy put on this world to suffer for the amusement of the worthy.
  6. Husky

    Husky Well-Known Member

    Sadangel, this is just a quick note to say I'm thinking of you and wishing you well. I guess I'm still curious about what would make you happy? Anyway, I hope you're feeling better. Forgotten_Man, you call yourself unworthy. You know what I would challenge you to do. Write down ten good things about yourself or good things you have done in your life. I sometimes think of myself as unworthy but then I did this and I think I'm not unworthy at all. If you're not worthy, who are the worthy? Try to write ten good things about them. If you compare, I wouldn't be surprised if you come out on top. I hope that you're feeling better too.
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