Seems so easy now!

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by masive, Mar 14, 2010.

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  1. masive

    masive Banned Member

    Firstly I just want to say this is very hard to talk about but with no-one knowing who I am its makes it alittle easier.. I am sure many understand.

    I have a problem with derpression. I am not mad or mentally ill but some times i have bad days of feeling, lonely. empty and sad because of things that happen over my child hood and the break up of my ex girlfriend.

    I have contantplated with the idea of suicide for some time now, the thought of just driving in genual and then pull across the road into the on coming lorry seems, yet, so easy!. The reason I haven't is because
    1- Will god forgive me if I do.
    2- The sad feeling I get of leaving my dad, mum and brother behine. and
    3- I feel weak if I do.

    I dont feel guilty I just feel down all the time mostly at nights and evenings they are the worst. I can't think of the last time i was genualry happy in myself. I listen to sad music and something about feeling this way I enjoy yet i dont want to feel this way.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Go talk to your doctor okay get on some antidepressants they do help please ask your doctor for help so yu can stay strong for your family they would love to see you happy and well. talk to your doctor get healing now
  3. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    If you do have depression then that is a mental health problem and there is absolutely no shame in that.

    I completely agree with Violet about going to your doctor and being honest and asking for his/her help.

    It also sounds like you need some help dealing with some issues from your past. Have you thought about therapy? There are lots of ways and means to get therapy in the UK. It could really benefit you.

    Also, I just wanted to add another reason for not crashing into that lorry- it will scar and damage that driver (mentally as well as potentially physically) for life- if the crash does not take it.
  4. Things

    Things Well-Known Member

    What you're feeling doesn't make you weak, it's not your fault at all. These feelings are the result of an illness, not lack of strength.

    I don't have anything to add that hasn't been said. Just please hang in there.
  5. masive

    masive Banned Member

    Then why is it that when i am at home alone digging a deeper and deeper hole i feel like i enjoy this feeling?

    I don't and won't take any tablets full stop.. I am not mad just feeling dead down some times.

    Thank you for the engouragement guys..:thanks:
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