self destruct begins in 5...4...3...2....

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by silentlyfading, Dec 5, 2013.

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  1. silentlyfading

    silentlyfading Well-Known Member

    Just came home. On the way back my anger got the better of me cant help it I explode im so volatile right now. Anyway some guys in a van pulled out on me, I lost it pulled infront of em and stopped my car. 3guys got out all over 6ft im only 5'9 and still I go for it so now im sitting here abit brused to say the least,but yet I feel better some how?? Why is this?? Anyone else go through this??
  2. demuredawn

    demuredawn Well-Known Member

    I don't have anger issues in that way, so no, I don't personally go through it... but my husband does. I tend to turn anger inward and abuse myself with it, sometimes lil bits of it will seep outward (sometimes those lil bits may seem like a lot from the words i say) but mostly, it stays in. However, I have watched my husband struggle with this type of thing. He won't ever listen when I try to calm him though... so I"m not sure if thats because my words/advice aren't worth listening to, or if its just him.... but I will tell you some of the things I've tried to tell him:

    When you feel yourself getting angry, remove yourself from the situation... don't think about it, just do it
    After you are away from the situation, then start trying to do relaxation excercises (deep breathing from the diaphragm, muscle relaxation, visualization, meditation, etc) ... I can give you links on how to do these things if you need/want. Different relaxation techniques work better for different people. And sometimes a technique will work for one situation, but not the next... so make sure to find a few different techniques that work.
    After you are not so focused on the thing that triggered you, you can then move on to something like journaling, or drawing, or writing poetry/songs/stories, or painting... playing games, etc... some kind of distraction
    You can also play relaxing music in the background and/or get the scent of lavender in the air (that scent has relaxing properties).
    If you are still upset after doing these things, don't worry, it's ok... but, now you are in a place where you can talk things through better, your mind should be a little less "triggered", and more able to hear others rather than hear the thing that angered you... find someone to talk to that you trust and just vent, but if you find yourself getting more angry again, stop-refocus, because this generally means you are concentrating too hard on your anger, and not enough on the goal of replacing your anger with peace or laughter or any other lighter emotion
    also... sometimes comedy movies can be beneficial... or if you're just unable to get that thought of wanting to hurt someone for hurting you out of your head, listen to songs about anger, watch action type movies...

    i dont know if you will find any of this helpful, but i hope it is... sorry if i'm just speaking out my hat and making things worse or making you feel worse, if thats the case then please ignore this response...

    i wish you all the best *hug
  3. silentlyfading

    silentlyfading Well-Known Member

    Thanks for replying I do have extreme anger issues boxing has helped alot teaches you to discipline you're self through anger to remain calm. Im usually very passive but every now and then I explode. Its almost like I look for trouble just to get it out. No fear at all and adrenaline numbs the pain at the time makes for a dangerous situation I black out in anger, literally out of control it scares me. Im kinda glat it was 3 people because if it was just 1 who knows what would of happend. I can't remove myself because of the lack of control I have over my anger. Ive been to many AM meetings but beem banned from each one because I get aggressive. They don't understand my illness im not just a pissed of guy who's mad at the world. N I think because of the way I look they judge me and see me as trouble cus im quite short, muscular and have tattoos. I can obtain my anger when im in my normal phase, but when im low it just spirals
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