Self destruction

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Hurted, Jan 8, 2009.

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  1. Hurted

    Hurted Well-Known Member

    I don't sleep enough
    I eat unhealty
    I cut myself
    I smoke
    I drink
    I have low self esteem
    I'm depressed
    I have anxiety
    I hate the way how i look

    I can't control my life anymore... :sad:

    Im only 17, and i am already fucked up.

    This winter i've been sick 3 times...
     
  2. mystereo2099

    mystereo2099 Well-Known Member

    I don't sleep much either (strung out constantly, literally up for days on end w/o a wink.)
    I don't eat at all (cept for pills of various colors, and an occasional pot brownie or shroom)
    I don't cut myself
    I've been smoking for 6 years? (more maybe I kinda blocked it out, i don't want to remember.)
    I prolly drink more (tequila and beer 24/7)
    Self-esteem? What's that?
    Depression is a bitch, and it won't let up.
    Anxiety... I don't leave my house and I cut off my friends years ago. Bordering on anti-social hermit.
    I broke all my mirrors so I wouldn't have to see myself.

    Control, yeh I gave up on that one too.

    I'm 19, seems I've got two years on you. Still I prevail, still I exist rotting alone in my head.

    Sick three times, I've been dopesick atleast that many - and by dopesick I mean convulsions, shivering til muscles ache, puking and ... at the same time, dizziness etc. Man withdrawal's a bitch.

    Keep hangin in there, one more day at a time. If I can do it you can - but I'll warn you. Drugs can be a bad habit, much more damaging than cutting - if use is frequent and sustained.

    Oh yeh, and I'm getting kicked out by abusive father, have no mother, no car, no job, and am running out of drugs. And no one's hiring, I've tried everywhere. Kinda sucks being anti-social bc when you get kicked out you can't go stay at a friend's because you don't have any. >.<

    ONE DAY AT A TIME!
     
  3. Mightbehere

    Mightbehere Well-Known Member

    tell me over and over and over again my friend I can't believe were on the eve of destruction.
     
  4. Hurted

    Hurted Well-Known Member


    My situation is not so bad, but it's still causing lots of trouble.

    I used to smoke weed everyday, it fucked me up, now i do speed from time to time, but i dont think it's dangerous since im rarely "doing drugs"...
     
  5. mandel32

    mandel32 Member

    sounds really fucked up.... I'm 20 and i also was suicidal, but not to the point were "u are in" right now. I am not in any situation to tell you to Change ur lives i just know how hard it is to change. The feeling of deep depression makes u dont want to do anything at all..... Makes one feel very lazy, hopeless, selfish and worthless. It feels as if u envy people on the streets..... Think this and dat...... Dude, anyway my name is Manuel and I'm from the Philippines. Its true one day at a time..... Things will get better.... Mine did it took some time though. About 5 months. I hope urs will get better as well. P.S.
    someone who cares..........
     
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