Self Image

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by *dilligaf*, Mar 3, 2009.

  1. *dilligaf*

    *dilligaf* Staff Alumni

    I'm sick of it. I'm sick of not being able to look in a mirror. I'm sick of not being able to look at a picture of myself.

    I hate it.

    It's okay for people to say they love me how I am, or that I'm pretty, or that it's what's inside that counts .... but I hate how I look. It's not about what other people think. It's about what I think.

    And I hate it.

    People would like me more if I was skinny. I know they would. Doesn't matter how many times they say they wouldn't. They would.

    I can't walk into my bathroom without looking at my scales. I hate getting on them, it's never gonna be as good as I want it to be.

    I hate it.

    Hate me. Hate me. Hate me.

    Why can't I just not eat? Why can't I loose weight? Why can't I go back to my slimming pills? Why can't I be skinny?

  2. SpencerA

    SpencerA Well-Known Member

    do what you have to do beby, whatever happens you need to learn to appreciate yourself, but just know that i love you for who you are and think you're beautiful no matter what.
  3. *dilligaf*

    *dilligaf* Staff Alumni


    Why can't other people see what I see?
  4. flowerpot

    flowerpot Well-Known Member

    know exactly what you mean..
    i'd love to destroy my self just over the fact that i'm disgusting.
    & it's not just one little thing.. it's everything
    i hate every single part of me
    it's so annoying, i know they don't mean anything bad, but when people tell you you're beautiful or something.. they're just saying it because they have to
    but you know inside you're not

    honestly though.. it's probably just life being cruel to you.. you'll always see yourself worse than others.. you're probably not as bad as you believe

    you probably don't want to hear it i know.. but you are beautiful

    i truly hope the way you see yourself changes one day
  5. *dilligaf*

    *dilligaf* Staff Alumni

    :hug: Flowerpot, I am sorry you feel the same way too.

    I hope one day we both feel better about how we look
  6. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    :hug: sam

    I think the problem here is acceptance. You have to accept and like yourself before others will accept you too.I've seen a picture of you and to be honest I think you're perfect the way you are. You need to work on your self esteem issues hun, perhaps therapy would be the way to go? :hug:
  7. *dilligaf*

    *dilligaf* Staff Alumni

    :mad: perfect :rolleyes:

    Jokin aside, thank you :hug:
  8. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

    i understadn what your saying sam, but doesnt mean i will agree with what your saying. :hug:
  9. andyc68

    andyc68 Guest

    i agree that you need to work on liking who you are to be able to see what others see in you sam, i told you last night that i don't think your fat and besides hun, curvy is much better than skinny.
    i understand you think you need to slim from a self esteem point of veiw but i think you dont need to.
  10. JohnADreams

    JohnADreams Well-Known Member

    I'm trying to lose a bit of weight myself. There's nothing wrong with self improvement, as long as they aren't taken to the extreme and if you're doing it for the right reasons. If you treat yourself as if you have already accomplished your goals, I think it often makes them much easier to achieve in reality. :smile:
  11. thing

    thing Member

    Is your negative self image the result of teasing or a parent's attempt to keep your weight under control? My problem was the latter and to this day I think of myself as hugely fat. My husband thinks I'm crazy because I am 5'7" and weigh around 150. I am also 47 years old so this is a normal size but because of all the badgering and name calling from my super skinny mom while I was growing up, I hate the way I look.

    I cannot remember a time when I wasn't on a diet. I took pills and starved myself until I was sick. I was never satisfied with my size even when people started to tell me that I looked terrible and gaunt. I still thought that I was fat but when I see photos of myself from back then I am horrified at how I looked. My eyes and cheeks were even sunken in! Yet, in my mind I was fat.

    I still compare myself to every woman I see and I don't feel good about myself if someone is thinner, even if that someone is a model and half my age. I don't have the skinny body type and no amount of dieting will ever get me to where I want to be. I am finally trying to accept the fact that I am who I am and I'm fine because it sickens me to think of all the time I wasted feeling depressed over something that wasn't real. Just because a person isn't skinny doesn't mean that they aren't attractive. That's why I asked you that question in the beginning. You may be seeing yourself as fat because something happened along the way to change your perception. I wasted over 30 years hating my looks when I am actually an attractive person and I hate to think of you going through that if you don't have to. Now I'm near 50 and realize that it's all downhill from here. I have wrinkles and cellulite and I never appreciated what I had going for me until it was too late. I know it's hard to do but it will be worth it if you can look at yourself as others do and see the beauty in who you are.