self talk to me

Discussion in 'Rape and Abuse' started by total eclipse, Aug 3, 2009.

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  1. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    When i am in so much pain when i can't breath
    i talk to myself to me and to who ever it is inside thats weak
    i just want her to go away please someone help me to do this
    i just want to be me again without her and her pain and weakness
    i try to understand why she is this way but everytime i am in pain
    i am attacked verbally emotionally i can't take her she is too dam weak
    I don't want this to go on so please somehow i just have to make this stop
    why why why won't it stop dam it i want to be left alone.
    Please make the pain go away please i can't take her anymore
    i thought after last emotional attack she would stay hidden she wouldn't come out she wouldn't trust but now she is doing stupid thinks again
    she is going to get herself hurt again
    I wish my T was here he would tell me what to do
    You know what to do stop this BS and grow up just stop it it a simple as that
    Mary grow up now please just stop going back stay in present
    HOw do i stay here andnot be brought back to her again.
     
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    :hug:

    You mentioned that you wish your therapist was with you.Where is your therapist? Have you any way of contacting them atm
    Im sorry you're feeling this way.
    Pm me anytime hun xx
     
  3. PandorasToybox

    PandorasToybox Well-Known Member

    :hugtackles: Stay strong Mary :love:
     
  4. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    My therapist is on vacation. I am trying to stay rational stay callm breathe
    i know what to do i do but it is not working
    i know it is because i am alone again i know i hate being alone
    they are all gone now
    one week to get through on my own
    wish i could talk to someone
    but i can't
    I won't do that again
    just be hurt like before
    i don't understand the confusiion
    i will go for a walk
    i will get out of here
    i need to have them home with me
    but i can't they need to get help stay put
    i have to just keep busy somehow
    i will keep busy going out away from here for awhile
    thanks i am okay staying in present thats what is needed.
    thanks for responses
     
  5. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Aww Mary :hug: Perhaps calling a crisis line would help?

    Keep distracting yourself and the week will be gone before you know it. Do they have any temp/substitute counsellors on the team?
     
  6. PandorasToybox

    PandorasToybox Well-Known Member

    We're not going anywhere Mary :hugtackles: I think a walk will make you feel better, walks can be very relaxing! :smile:

    I agree, maybe a crisis line/team could help?
     
  7. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    WEnt out for a bit calm myself down sorry im okay now going to bed.
     
  8. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    sleep well mary,stay strong xx
     
  9. PandorasToybox

    PandorasToybox Well-Known Member

    Sweet dreams Mary :hugtackles:
     
  10. Little_me

    Little_me Well-Known Member

    Stay strong Mary. It will be worth it some day.
     
  11. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Its okay your not her no more keep saying that soon brain will believe it
     
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