my husband and i have been together for 23 years this year, married for 16 years. we always had a very healthy sex life and never had any problems even when the kids come along nothing changed. nearly 4 years ago now he had a serious road accident and suffered a fractured pelvis and dislocated hip. he was bed bound for 3 weeks and discharged home to recuperate. this was slow and painful for him. he got back on his feet and returned to work 3 months later. he had an accident at work 9 months later and suffered a repeat of the original break. he saw a consultant and he said he would do a full hip replacement, which he got done almost a year later. he suffers a lot of pain and due to other health issues he is not well a lot of the time. our sex life has suffered immensely and i miss it a lot. we used to cuddle a lot too but even that has stopped due to him finding most sitting or lying positions painful. i feel we have grown apart so much and feel all we have left to keep us together is the kids, dont get me wrong i believe in the whole 'in sickness and in health' thing but i dont feel the same about our relationship. i feel very selfish thinking this way and i know hes in terrible pain but feel its a very hard subject to talk with him about.
I think you should definitely raise the subject (so to speak), see how he feels - maybe think about talkin to your doctor about it to see if there are other painkiller options?
he has pain meds to take but cannot take them during the day because he has a heavy manual job working with all sorts of power tools etc and he doesnt feel safe taking the pain meds while working. the meds are strong and he said he could hurt himself bad without knowing or feeling it.
There are some exceptional sex therapists who deal with intimacy after accidents and illnesses...maybe professional input might be helpful
