Sex is one thing..................

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by me myself and i, Apr 15, 2011.

  1. me myself and i

    me myself and i Account Closed

    Since my marriage ended i have had sex with quite a few women, guess part of it proving to myself that rejection was by only one woman the rest to try to replicate something i once had and to feel loved again.
    Its all been cold though, i have ended every tryst, swiftly and easily.
    Im terrified of making love though, to someone that i have feeling for.
    Sex is easy, its the bit that gets me to the bedroom dooor again i want in my life once more.
    Damn, why does it get harder?
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 15, 2011
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Sex is not initimacy...and initimacy cannot be replaced in that way...the right person will bring the right feelings...and it seems that cannot be feigned...J
     
  3. Acro

    Acro Active Member

    Sadeyes is right, sex is not intimacy.

    In my relationship with my ex, it was through us having sex that I realized he didn't really love me, I was too scared to admit that to myself at the time. I made excuses, but I knew his heart wasn't in it, we weren't "making love" as you say, we were just having sex. I hated that, I kept hoping things would change and he'd magically suddenly not be a liar who was using me. But sadly he made it clear to me later that he had used me and lied to me. You can't make people love you by having sex with them, you won't get what you want with shallow relationships. I had thought my relationship with my ex wasn't shallow, we had been friends for a long time, we had fallen in love or at least that is what he had told me. I thought that night in bed was going to be the loving night I had dreamed of all my life, but it wasn't and neither was any following time. He wasn't able to give me the love and intimacy I craved because he didn't love me. Me, Myself and i, you need to find someone who will really love you and who you will love back too, and even though you might be terrified of trying again or being rejected, you need to do it. You need to try in order to ever get what you want, you can't find the intimacy and love you want if you avoid trying.