I am really thankful that all of you are able to describe why you are feeling suicidal. It really helps me to feel less alone. I dont tell anyone close to me about my thoughts because I dont want to worry them. I have had suicidal thoughts frequently for many years. The intensity increases in times of crisis. Currently I am unemployed and I have some support for the time being. I am trying to focus on the present instead of worrying about the future.