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She Still Has Too Much Control Of My Heart

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Forgotten_Man, Jul 18, 2010.

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  1. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    What The Fuck Z? I miss two of your fucking phone calls and all of the sudden I am trying to avoid you? What am I supposed to do? Always answer my phone? Always be around? Tuck You when you practice what you are preaching I will do the same.

    Yet why does this hurt so much? Why did I lose all my motivation to go to my spin class this morning why did I lose all that motivation. I mean fuck I can even see some small results and I did not want to go. I do not want to do anything but lie around and play Dragon Quest 9. The tonight hang myself because she looks for any reason to not be my friend. Maybe this is the wrong forum. I don't know, it just hurts when a friend finds ever reason she can to pin the destroying on me when I have done nothing.
  2. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

  3. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    Hey FM if it is any consolation I am the same way ...I get devastated by situations like that and of course am hard on myself...like I take it all out on B for some reason? Idk but I do it.
    Please be gentle with yourself today and allow your heart to heal in what ever way it needs to. I for one would be afraid to go to spinning class for fear of missing a call and then what all the good you felt for doing something goes crashing down.
    Iguess I could tell you forget about her and go about you things but I am not that way so can hardly push you to do that...sometimes others have a hold on our heart or psyche and all we can do is work through it..time does heal it too so sometimes it is just ridin out the storm as I say.

    Well you are not alone, we are with you and you can always PM me.
    Love B
  4. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    Thanks Bambi, and Daphna.

    Next time she calls me when I am at the gym I am going to call her back. However, I am going to wait until 22:00 or 23:00 to do it. That way I can say I called her back. I know her little fucking game. However, I would not put it past her to be lurking on this forum so I am not going to spell it out here. It is not my fault I am trying to be considerate of her sleep schedule. Not that she EVER gave me the courtesy of calling me back withing any less than 2 days of any phone call I made.
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