I run my hand down the back of a lover and try to sort out these indecisive feelings try to say, without using words, or opening myself to more pain, please. Later that day, curled tightly in a ball a dent in the cushioned breadth of my empty bed I wrap my adult arms around a child’s toy, which doesn’t cry out, and try to crawl out of my own head. Can someone tell me the secrets of my quiet fall tell me how to leave it all behind but have it all? God knows he made a stunner in her you know I want to have my cake and eat it too. Eyes like a killer and a body like a god he opened up the cosmos and thus spake: “Hips like a…” boomshebang and I lose the words to say that she move my world and ignite my mmm... my everything. “Look what you done” I think, but don’t say. Because to speak would be to give it all away.