Shld it be the end now

just got home from hospital on a 2 week leave of absence
they are not even sure I am ready
so we are taking a chance
sent me home with 5 weeks of pills - all types
wwe don't even know if they are going to work til the end of sept
allergic to them, sent my blood pressure through the roof
so we are dealing with it, new pills but i have no way of
checking my blood pressure! so hope these meds work
i don't know, come home, overwelming
sat down and cried
i really don't know if i can do this
maybe it is time to throw in the towel
maybe it is time to give up
my neighbours are camping, so there is no one to check on me
they have the keys to my house, no one else.
as i look through the house i don't know if I can do this
so much and its my own stupid fault
why couldn't i be strong, no - i got to go and fall apart
i have wasted my life..............
i look at my pills, they sent me home with 7 different pills
quite the combination
i know what they would do
i still hve on my bracelet suicide awareness someone cares for me
then why does it feel like i have been thrown into a shark bowl
and about to be swallowed up.

 

Is there anything you could do to get your mind off the depression tonight? Maybe soak in a warm bath for a little bit and relax. Put a movie in and watch it, or get in bed with a good book to read. Try to distract your mind from feeling so down. If all else fails, take something to help you sleep, and just get some rest.

If you don't feel capable of being home alone, maybe you should go back to the hospital and tell them how you feel.

Whatever they have done for you, doesn't seem to be very helpful. What are all the medications that they put you on? It is kind of ridiculous to send a patient home that is feeling suicidal with 7 different medications in their possession.

Trust me, mixing pills, taking too many, it doesn't work. I have taken some major overdoses, and a very dangerous medication, I am still here..

Don't make yourself feel any worse by doing that sweetie. It's not going to do anything but make you sick, and more depressed.

 

i hear your pain , i hope you can get adjusted and it works out for you , if you ever want to just reach out , dont hesitate to come on here, we will all support you as much as we can :hug:

 

i am absolutely silly to think i am can do this, its just not possiblle
its tooo far gone, too late now, waay to laatte.
1 set of sleeping pills done nothing, that was 2 hours ago
gonna go with the next set now, maybe get some pills to work here
tired, overwhelmed and have just had it.

 

Re: SHOULD IT BE THE END NOW. - i tried...

i really really treid i jusst can''t seem to suicced aat
aatny anythinngg.

 

Oh my gosh sweetie, have you overdosed on sleeping pills? Or was you just trying to take a couple to get some sleep? You have me a bit worried.

Your not going to get better if your doing things like this. If you have overdosed, I hope you will call 911 once you wake up, if you can't find the courage yourself, please email me your contact information, and I will call for you.

I'm so sorry it's so bad. I really wish there was something I could do right now.