Had a short glimpse of hope today where I felt really happy. Lasted about an hour. Best I have felt in weeks. Have no idea what triggered it. Heaps of energy, felt like running and screaming or doing something real crazy and out there to show everyone how good I felt. Then CRASH!! Back to reality and the usual feeling terrible. Just want to die. Spent the morning considering why i shouldnt drive myself off the road. Tell me how on earth it is possible to go from suicidal to crazy happy to suicidal again in the space of one day. I CAN NOT do this anymore. I am a mental case! Please world just let me die. Let me have peace!