Should I Disappear

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Forgotten_Man, Jun 14, 2010.

?

Should I Just Go?

  1. Yes, you are here for the wrong reasons

    2 vote(s)
    9.1%
  2. No, your reasons are not all wrong

    4 vote(s)
    18.2%
  3. No you are helping/being helped even if you cannot see it

    14 vote(s)
    63.6%
  4. Yeah sure, who are you?

    2 vote(s)
    9.1%
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  1. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    I do not know if this is the right forum for this, feel free to move if need be.

    So I am wondering should I disappear from this forum? I ask this because I feel like I came back for all the wrong reasons. Yes I feel depressed and suicidal. However, I feel that this place enables me to feel that way sometimes. I feel like I come here for attention more than anything. I get it sometimes.

    The main reason I think I came back was to replace something I lost in real life that started here. I wanted to replace that in my life. What I found here was wonderful. So wonderful that I in fact left, because I became happy. Now that is gone I return? I just cannot help feeling like I am using this place for something nefarious.

    I know in the end it is my choice. However I cannot help but want to ask how people feel about me staying here? Most of the time I feel like I am out of place and a passing whisper in a sea of screams.
     
  2. cult logic

    cult logic Staff Alumni

    Everyone will tell you not to go regardless of their actual opinion, as it will be considered unsupportive if they say "GTFO no one likes you" and just kinda a dick thing to say.

    And honestly, most people will probably not feel strongly one way or another.

    So the poll is not really going to get you anywhere, ultimately only you can decide if you should be here or not.

    Are you doing something nefarious? Probably not.

    Just look at it objectively of what the pros and cons of being here versus not being here are.
     
  3. yous

    yous Well-Known Member

    I feel the same way always. I came here looking for some sort of help with the pain I'm going through. Anything. And in some ways it did help me understand my situation. I tried to balance life and issues and always came back here to vent or ask for support which I got somewhat.

    Whether or not you should disappear is a decision only you should make.

    Reason I say this is because I just went through a friendship that was all about disappearing. I was tired of people disappearing in my life (Flakes). And yet i thought I found a person who understood that and didn't want it either, yet sure enough that person disappeared out of my life and I'm left back to square one. It wasn't a decision for me to make for that person to disappear, yet it was a decision that person made.
     
  4. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    I know this is kind of a feudal thread. It is hard though, I guess I am just addicted to input from others. As for What I am doing... yeah it is nefarious. Not an open thread discussion.

    Have not seen you around here before.

    Yeah I do not want to flake out at the same time I think it is necessary. I just do not know why. I do Not want to disappear for another couple of years and then come back.
     
  5. 41021

    41021 Banned Member

    Hey look, staying here offers you a little bit of stability, doesn't it? SF has been around a while, and it's always here. I like that.

    Why not just stay? I would prefer you stay. You offer good support to people. You are a very supportive, caring, friendly person and it's nice having you around. You seem very open too. I like reading your input and i do read your threads. It's also nice having the stability of members who stick around.

    I try to respond when i can. It's not always easy, but i do try. When i'm not doing well i tend to just drop off. Do know, i read your threads :hug: I like seeing you around. You seem like a neat fellow and i would love to see things work out for you.

    Stick around please????

    :hug:
     
  6. Sapphire

    Sapphire Well-Known Member

    No you shouldn't as you obviously get something out of being here.
     
  7. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    :cry: :hug: now I really feel like an attention ***** :cry: thanks though. I have missed you hun.

    I hate how I can only be open on the net. Maybe I shouldn't stop posting threads... maybe dedicate more time to helping others.

    :hugtackles: thanks hun.
     
  8. 41021

    41021 Banned Member

    Oh, I forgot to mention this part;
    Everyone needs a little attention :console: Some people never get any. Everyone has different requirements as to how much they need. You know what? It's okay. It really is okay. I don't think that is what you are doing, but look, even if you were, It's okay. :hug:

    You know, if any of us needs a little attention or tender care, we should be able to raise our hand and say, "hey, over here please...i need a little". There is absolutely nothing wrong with that :hug: Sometimes i just need a hug (or lots of them) and just want to say, "Hey folks, i need some, please".

    Many folks have never learned to make their needs known, to ask for what they need. It can take a lot of courage to tell others what we need or too simply admit we have needs. :console:

    Sometimes too, we need someone to just sit with us, even if it is online.

    It's okay to post. It's okay to help. Both are fine. :hug:

    I think you are A-OK !!!!!

    :hug:
     
  9. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    Hey FM..I don't think you should go if you find even the slightest support here..
    that's why the forum is here....
    I would miss you /your posts and you seem to have a lot of people reply when you post....
    I don't believe you are attention seeking ....
    but it's your decision in the end.....
    I hope you stay...:hugtackles:
     
  10. yous

    yous Well-Known Member

    What is making you want to flake from this site? Remember what I said to you? The most important is YOUR happiness, and YOU. So again, what is making you flake? If the answer makes you unhappy, then you already have your answer to leave. If you can live with your answer, then I don't see why you shouldn't stick around.
     
  11. bluegrey

    bluegrey Antiquities Friend

    You seem to believe you don't have legitimate reasons to be depressed but the fact is you are tremendously unhappy and you continually consider ending your life. You should stay here to post and get the attention and support you deserve.

    You help other members here with thoughtful replies too- I hope you stay but I hope you lose the depression first.
    :console::thumbup:
     
  12. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    @Kali: :cry: it just feels like I need too much attention all the time. I feel bad because there are days when all I do is check my threads and forget that others exist as well.

    I know about the hug thing too. I wish I had someone who I could just lie on my couch with and hug while there was anime around. :hug: I try to give out as many hugs as I get.

    I just don't always feel like I am helping when I post... whether it be making a thread or replying to them.

    @IV2010: It really depends on the post... :( sorry I am kind of obsessed with my posting... when I ramble the thread stays quiet. I just feel like I need to be heard..

    @yous: The problem is I feel like this site enables me to be depressed. I like coming here and getting hugs and advice. As well as trying to keep up with threads and advising people. At the same time... well I get triggered. I don't know...
     
  13. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    Maybe a few days break will give some insight on how you go without SF...
     
  14. yous

    yous Well-Known Member

    Well which gives you the grandeur scale? Coming to this site and getting depressed, or being ok by helping people? I share your same feeling. Normally I come here if I start losing it, and stick with it until I regain a certain level, and if I feel ok enough I help out then leave until the next wave hits me, which I know is not far off. So go in waves I guess?
     
  15. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    I try to believe that... just when life seems so good compared to the others... it is hard to want to stay even if I am suicidal

    ^^;; already tried that did not go well when I am depressed.

    Hmmm waves eh? Sometimes I think I am very internet addicted... and that seems to make me flare up when I am not entirely happy with life.
     
  16. yous

    yous Well-Known Member

    Well if you are indeed internet savvy, there are plenty of forums that do not deal with depression but maybe to tailor to your interests as well. If you can find another forum to attach yourself to? It's like having a lot of "friends". You use this person to go out with, that person to complain to, that person to borrow money from. That way this forum won't consume your entire life and jeopardize your emotion because its the only one. Just trying to suggest. I'm exactly the same way, so I'm trying to think this through just as I type. But I guess it's like the saying goes, you shouldn't just stick with one good thing? I know that sounds cheesy.
     
  17. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    I am on other forums. Just some are massive sand hard to keep up with. However, I do see your point.
     
  18. kitanai

    kitanai Well-Known Member

    i cant even find a forum besides this one
    i only have 1 friend here
    and i wonder is she a friend or just
    someone trying to feel better threw helping others
    either way the lack of friends via the net is not helping
    meeting anyone in real life is a joke

    well i hope for each others sake we get better
    hang in there FM
     
  19. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    Wow I havve a hard time finding places that are not forums.
     
  20. ASkylitDrive

    ASkylitDrive Well-Known Member

    If you think this thread supports you, stay.

    I don't find the right support sometimes, but I do like the distraction, and you say when you ramble the threads stay quiet..you can always come and talk to me if you need it.
     
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