Should I just accept it?

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Gimiq, May 30, 2012.

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  1. Gimiq

    Gimiq Well-Known Member

    Should I just accept ill always be alone. That I will never have a companion? I dont fit in and every releationship I have fails. I dont want this to happen. I want to love someone, as much as my ex fiance.... I... God I hate myself, I dont want to be like everyone else but I dont want to be alone. I have been that way so long...
     
  2. TheLoneWolf

    TheLoneWolf Well-Known Member

    I don't think so. I spent many years alone, without any kind of relationship or anything. Not intentionally, it's just that nobody wanted to be with me. Now I'm married to someone that I don't really want to be with. I thought that being with her would be better than being alone. But I was wrong. I should have waited for the right person, even if it took forever to find them. The right person would be worth the wait. But you'll never meet the right person if you don't try. You need to keep hoping and trying, but you also have to be content being alone in the meantime. If you get too desperate in your situation, it will drive people away, and you will end up with the wrong person. I know it sounds cliché, but you need to be happy with yourself first. But don't give up on some day finding someone. Accept your current situation for now, but keep your options open for the future.
     
  3. vjred

    vjred Member

    Have you ever heard what is worst than being alone and lonely. It’s being lonely with someone else.

    I know that it is hard being by yourself. I was one of those people that was lonely with someone else for 10 years. That really does suck.

    You might feel like you are on the outside looking in and why don’t or can’t find what everybody else has. Really lots of people are in the same place and you just don’t know it.

    Just as stated before, learn to love yourself and while you’re working on that you just might be surprised. When you’re not looking is when people sometimes find the most amazing partners
     
  4. TheLoneWolf

    TheLoneWolf Well-Known Member

    This is absolutely true. I am married and lonely. Worst of all, I can't meet anyone. I have a 0% chance of finding the right woman, because I'm stuck with the wrong one. But you, as long as you are alone, have a chance to meet the right person. Don't give up! The more you put yourself out there and get involved in different things, the more likely you are to meet somebody special. You might have to go through a lot of bad dates with the wrong people first, but there are billions of people on the planet, so you'll never run out of new opportunities.
     
  5. Gimiq

    Gimiq Well-Known Member

    I understand what your saying I just dont know how to respond but thank you for understanding.
     
  6. TheLoneWolf

    TheLoneWolf Well-Known Member

    Ray, don't be so hard on yourself, man. It's hard forming lasting relationships. I was never able to keep anyone that I wanted, they always got bored with me. The only one I was able to keep was the one who bored me. If it wasn't for her, I would probably be alone now, too. I don't know what it is that people expect out of a relationship. I know what I want from a woman, but I have no idea what women expect out of me. I've tried to be what they wanted, and I failed. But you've got to keep trying. You've obviously had relationships before, so it's not like you're some hopeless guy who can't even get a date - I was that hopeless guy once. You just have to keep getting out there and keep trying, keep meeting new people. You learn something from every failed relationship; if nothing else, you learn what doesn't work. So next time you try something different, or you go after somebody different. It's not a smooth or perfect process; if it was, then the divorce rate wouldn't be 50%, would it? Obviously there are a lot of people out there, men and women, who don't really know what they want, and a lot of relationships don't work out. But we keep trying, because it's in our nature to want to find love. Maybe it is out there somewhere. You just have to keep looking, keep trying, keep learning and adapting and growing as a person. Maybe you'll find that special someone, maybe you won't. Life is kind of a crapshoot. But you'll never know if you don't try.
     
  7. Gimiq

    Gimiq Well-Known Member

    Yeah.... This may sound odd or rude but its actually opposite. Thank you for posting. I cant deny your logic on the other hand I dont know how to approach people I stay cool and calm and act like them... I dunno guess your right. But again thanks for posting.
     
  8. TheLoneWolf

    TheLoneWolf Well-Known Member

    I don't know how to approach people either. I never know what to say. I always hope they'll approach me first, but they never do. Still, I like to think that some day I'll figure it out. Maybe you've got it more figured out than I do. You say you don't want to be like everyone else... what do you mean by that? I know we probably each have different ways of thinking and looking at things, so I'm trying to understand where you're coming from. I'd have to understand exactly what the problem is in order to help you come up with a solution. I'll be honest, I don't always relate to everybody's way of thinking, nor do they relate to mine. But I do always try to see things from their point of view to understand them better.
     
  9. Gimiq

    Gimiq Well-Known Member

    Humans exist as what they are. They respect force and force alone to be like them would to obtain what I want by any means nessecary. I would cease to be me as I would have to then guage my existence by my posetions. What they have is ash I want something more. im sorry its hard to understand its hard to explain.i guess to some it up home for me as a kid was like a impoverished country stuck in constant war. I know how extreme that sounds keep in mind its a metaphor.
     
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