Should I just dissapear?

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by bluet, Mar 21, 2009.

  1. bluet

    bluet Member

    The stupid problem that I have made in past keep on haunted me. If only I can turn back time..., I want to change it, but I can't! Now I have to take responsible of my past mistakes and feeling guilty everyday, and I have to fix that problem gradually for years to come. Instead of dealing with it until the whole thing is finish(might take years! That's crap!) mayeb its better to just dissapear and never get hurt again. How can I stop feeling guilty? Every friends that I know is smart and gorgeous and have a perfect life, I dont wanna be myself. I wanna someone better, I want to make this problem dissapear. How do you forgive yourself for all the crap you've done in the past? And all those motivational books didn't help with this guilt keep on coming. I wish I could turn back time, make a better decision, do it differently...
  2. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    It sounds like you are experiencing regret and guilt about the past. We are not in the past or in the future. So we only have right now, the present to "use" and live in.

    Everyone makes mistakes - whether they friends, family, significant other, school or career...The only way to grow sometimes is through making mistakes.

    Being depressed magnifies our negative feelings - guilt, low self-esteem, regrets, sadness, sense of having failed/not done as well as we might have. We often see the negative way out of proportion. Did you learn from the past? Will you do things do differently in the future?

    It sounds as though you would do things differently now. Instead of dwelling on things you cannot change, how about "knowing" what you learned and that you are now better equipped to move forward?

    Who says that you aren't smart and gorgeous? (No one has a "perfect" life. We just don't always know what problems others are dealing with or how they are dealing with them.) What steps can you take that emphasize your talents, looks and abilities? What aspects of you make you feel special and attractive - not what others think of you, what you feel about yourself is attractive? (If you say "nothing," you're being too hard on yourself.)

    By the way, real beauty is what radiates from inside and illuminates the person's being. A person may look gorgeous at a distance or on the surface - but that "image" is easy to see through if there is no "substance" on the inside. Develop your inner eye to see your own good qualities, hun, and then let them shine and glow.

    I think you're already starting to do that - just by asking the questions you asked.
  3. bluet

    bluet Member

    Yeah, I can fix the problems that I regret, but it will take years. Why can't we just turn back time and change everything?
    Me. I did and still do. Yeah, I know its the inside that matter, but isn't life is easier when you have the gorgeous face and everyone will be curious to know you, be your friends, lover, whatever..
    Someone in my club is happen to be the most handsome boy, and he can do chess, martial art, music, japanese language, great GPA, basically he just like jumped out of a comic book or movie. How can you stop feeling depress when there is someone who remind you about how stupid, ugly, and un-talented you are?
    You sure its not better to just do a plastic surgery?
  4. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    Try not to compare yourself with someone else because they are different from you in background, mentality, personality, etc.
  5. bluet

    bluet Member

    Thats why I wish I have their background, face, personality, etc. Having a mistake in the past made me feel guilt everyday...
  6. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Don't be so quick to judge yourself!! You can't change the past...All you can do is strive to be a better person here and now..If you do your best on a dailey basis then your future will look briter... Like the old saying goes, just take it one day at a time..
  7. bluet

    bluet Member

    Help....Someone...i need to talk to anyone..I feel like a crap and i dont wanna do anything stupid today
  8. Tam

    Tam Well-Known Member

    Bluet - this is a late reply so hope you are still looking on the forum.

    You can send a pm if you like, or just say here what's going on. Is it the same as in your first post? Don't do anything before you've said some of what's happening to you now - I am listening.