I'm a guy. Sometimes I want to write down my thoughts. It seems pointless. I feel lousy after writing something personal. The longer and more in depth I write the lousier I feel afterward. Still, sometimes, I want it to be 'there'. I don't want to die alone. That is one of my fears. I want someone to understand me. If I wrote a journal my thoughts will remain, even if I am gone. But I want to be understood. No one is going to read what I write, and I wouldn't want them. They won't understand. If I kept a journal I would be only writing to myself; that seems pointless.